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kelbro

The end of a 40yr love(hate) affair

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My journey started as many did. A teenager hanging out with the older guys trying to fit in. Red Man, Days Work and Copenhagen. Dipped in school, sports, work, everywhere. Woke up wanting a dip. Spit a dip out right before I fell asleep every night.

 

Nasty smelling spitcups were everywhere. My dogs were always knocking them over, wow what a stinky mess.

 

My dear wife wouldn't kiss me for 30yrs but the hold the nic bitch had on me was stronger than the desire for my wife's kiss. Sad, isn't it?

 

I never had a quit last more than 24 hrs that I can recall. I 'thought' I wanted to quit but looking back, I know that I really didn't. I started a 'gradual' quit by switching to Skoal pouches. That might have helped but the desire was still there. That lasted about two years.

 

Once I finally decided that it was over between us, the nic bitch turned up the heat. It was hard getting through the first day. Hard the second day. Then I failed. I was determined not to let this setback stop me so I quit again but I got some nic replacement tablets. That kind of helped but in my mind it was still nicotine and I was not happy about just replacing one flavor of poison with another. Nicotine is such an insidious drug.

 

I searched the internet and read a bunch of testimonials about a product called Final Smoke. Liquid and tablets. That stuff really took away my cravings. I used it for less than a month and I was good to go. It REALLY helped eliminate the cravings.

 

Equally important in my mind was prayer. I know that I could not have done this without the support of my lord, Jesus Christ. He took away the guilt and the pain. He forgave me for the years of abuse that I heaped on my body with this drug. Only then was I able to forgive myself.

 

I found the MintSnuff pouches down at the hippie store. Those satisfied the urge of having something in my lip. Smoky Mountain from WalMart also filled a void. It looked and felt like snuff!

 

I found this website and it helped me with my accountability since I was apprehensive about telling my family that I was quitting. I was afraid that I would fail again.

 

I am coming up on 1000 days quit now. Absolutely no cravings for tobacco after the first month. Really! As long as I dipped and as many times as I failed at quitting by myself, I didn't think that I would see 100 days much less 1000 and I know that there is no way that I could try 'just one dip' without crashing.

 

I still use the 'crutches' (MintSnuff pouches and Smoky Mountain) but I'm OK with that. No tobacco! And, if I forget to take either of those with me or run out, there is no physical craving that makes me run to the store and buy it. I can go days without either and I'm fine. My teeth are white again!

 

You can quit. I will not say that it's easy but many people have quit nicotine. Much has been researched on the mental and physical hooks that nicotine has working against you. Take advantage of that research. Take advantage of the experiences of the great folks on this site that have faced the same challenges as you.

 

What I will say is that it is not all that hard keeping quit after you get over that hump. It may be a week or a month or a year but from what I read, nearly everyone has that hump and once you get past it, it gets easier to say NO to tobacco.

Edited by kelbro
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