Hogan's Appetite
By: 7iron


Several weeks ago I was feeding my two dogs, Heidi and Hogan. They get fed every morning and every evening and always know when it's time for their bowls to be filled. This particular morning, Hogan bounded and turned around in circles a couple times as he normally does (he gets pretty excited about mealtime). As usual, I put both dogs in a "stay", got their food, set it down before them, said "free" and watched closely as Hogan devoured his portion.

There is no possible way any dog could eat faster than Hogan. He does not chew; he inhales. He swallows whole everything he's given. Actually, I wonder if he even breathes as he eats. I mean, it looks almost dangerous, there is so much going down the hatch already, mixing air with moist kibbles could be serious trouble.

If Hogan could speak English, I'm sure he would tell you, "I love food!"

The thing is, I don't think he does. Heck, he doesn't even taste it. There is no savoring it, that's for sure. No, I think what Hogan really loves is satisfying his hunger. He craves food because that is how he quiets his stomach. He doesn't love food so much as he loves not being hungry.

I realized I'm a lot like Hogan. Our appetites are similar. Except his bowl of Pro Plan was my can of cope. I realized yet again, but in a different way, that I really don't want or need tobacco. So many times I reached for my can to satisfy my hunger. It didn't matter whether that hunger was based on lack of food, increased stress, boredom or some jubilant celebration of victory. My little can could satiate all my desires, all my hungers. After 24 years, the bad news is that I was confused at the core. I genuinely thought I liked tobacco much more than I really did. What I really wanted and needed were to satisfy some deeper cravings.

My mind and body got hard wired to reach for cope. The muscle memory of packing the can, opening the lid and plunging in for that "just right" three finger dip became ingrained. Do something over and over, tens of thousands of times and you'll eventually convince yourself you need it to just feel "normal". I've realized recently that so many times in the past when I thought I was enjoying a dip of cope, I was in fact just masking an unmet need or desire for something completely different.

I told many people over the years, friends and loved ones alike, that I enjoyed chewing and that I liked the taste. I believed that completely. Now I know that what I really liked was having a vast array of needs "satisfied" by the contents of a little round can.

Next time you get a craving for tobacco, ask yourself if tobacco is really what you want or is there something else. Do you really want a dip when you drive or do you just not want to be bored? Do you really want to stuff your face with tobacco first thing in the morning as a "pick me up" or do you just need more rest? Do you really need that fatty to enjoy mowing the lawn? Perhaps with the money you'll save not buying smokeless tobacco, you can hire a gardner? Is a wedge of snuff in your cheek gonna really help you deal with that irritated client, nasty coworker, screaming child, nagging spouse or do you really just need to find a way to effectively manage stress in your life?

And by the way, Hogan, buddy, don't worry. You'll get fed tomorrow just like you always do.