QUOTE (Truckerick @ Aug 25 2009, 04:57 PM)

"Every one says forgiveness is a lovely idea, until they have something to forgive ... And then, to mention the subject at all is to be greeted with howls of anger."
Now that I come to think of it, I have not exactly got a feeling of fondness or affection for myself, and I do not even always enjoy my own society. So apparently 'Love your neighbor' does not mean 'feel fond of him' or 'find him attractive'. I ought to have seen that before, because, of course, you cannot feel fond of a person by trying. Do I think well of myself, think myself a nice chap? Well, I am afraid I sometimes do (and those are, no doubt, my worst moments) but that is not why I love myself. In fact it is the other way round: my self-love makes me think myself nice, but thinking myself nice is not why I love myself. So loving my enemies does not apparently mean thinking them nice either. That is an enormous relief. For a good many people imagine that forgiving your enemies means making out that they are really not such bad fellows after all, when it is quite plain that they are. Go a step further. In my most clear-sighted moments not only do I not think myself a nice man, but I know that I am a very nasty one. I can look at some of the things I have done with horror and loathing. So apparently I am allowed to loathe and hate some of the things my enemies do. Now that I come to think of it, I remember Christian teachers telling me long ago that I must hate bad man's actions, but not hate the bad man: or, as they would say, hate the sin but not the sinner. ...
- C.S. Lewis From "Mere Christianity" Book 3 Chapter 7
One thing I have learned through studying the Bible is to include passages before and after the "quoted" passage. That allows me to be able to read it in context. What you have quoted or selected is Lewis' answer to the question he asks of "Well, how exactly do I love myself?" You also omitted part of the quote at the very beginnig of your post. With your ellipsis you passed over "as we had during the war." So, that entire portion of the chapter actually said:
"I said in a previous chapter that chastity was the most unpopular of the Christian virtues. But I am not sure I was right. I believe there is one even more unpopular. It is laid down in the Christian rule, 'Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.' Because in Christian morals 'thy neighbor' includes 'thy enemy', and so we come up against this terrible duty of forgiving our enemies.
Every one says forgiveness is a lovely idea, until they have something to forgive, as we had during the war. And then, to mention the subject at all is to be greeted with howls of anger. It is not that people think this too high and difficult a virtue: it is that they think it hateful and contemptible. 'That sort of talk makes them sick,' they say. And half of you already want to ask me, 'I wonder how you'd feel about forgiving the Gestapo if you were a Pole or a Jew?'
So do I. I wonder very much. Just as when Christianity tells me that I must not deny my religion even to save myself from death by torture, I wonder very much what I should do when it came to the point. I am not trying to tell you in this book what I could do — I can do precious little — I am telling you Christianity is. I did not invent it. And there, right in the middle of it, I find 'Forgive us our sins as we forgive those that sin against us.' There is no slightest suggestion that we are offered forgiveness on any other terms. It is made perfectly clear that if we do not forgive we shall not be forgiven. There are no two ways about it. What are we to do?
It is going to be hard enough, anyway, but I think there are two things we can do to make it easier. When you start mathematics you do not begin with the calculus; you begin with simple addition. In the same way, if we really want (but all depends on really wanting) to learn how to forgive, perhaps we had better start with something easier than the Gestapo. One might start with forgiving one's husband or wife, or parents or children, or the nearest N.C.O, for something they have done or said in the last week. That will probably keep us busy for the moment. And secondly, we might try to understand exactly what loving your neighbor as yourself means. I have to love him as I love myself. Well, how exactly do I love myself?" (http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/questionofgod/ownwords/mere2.html)
That is an interesting thought...forgiving the Gestapo if you were a Pole or Jew. I suggest you ask Ronald Cotton how he was able to forgive Jennifer Thompson-Cannino. She studied his face as he raped her over and over. She memorized it so that she would be able to idenitify him if she had to. Ronald Cotton was caught and she identified him as the man who raped her. He served 10.5 years before DNA evidence released him from prison. Somehow he forgave her though. They even became the best of friends. They wrote a book together and go on speaking tours. Her real rapist was caught tried and convicted.
Matthew 6:12
Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.
In other words, forgive me Lord for my sins as I have forgiven those who have sinned against me. I guess Ronald was able to forgive because he had been forgiven.