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  1. 10 points
    Hi; I'm Hoggle and I'm a nicotine addict. The whole shebang got started back in 1985. I was at the movies with some friends and was offered my first Skoal Bandit. Anyone else on here still remembers the green can with the word BANDITS on the side in pseudo-western lettering? I do. Anway, I took the hook...and got hooked. Such began an addiction that lasted until 100 days ago. Since I didn't have to spit with Bandits, they were the perfect way to hide a dip addiction. I went through a tin a day - I got my Bandits from a skeezy little bodega-type place where no one cared about how old you were. I dipped everywhere - school, the workplace, etc. Total ninja dipper. So, what motivated me to quit? I am now getting into middle age. I plan to retire soon. It's just plain silly for me to continue a juvenile act of rebellion into my retirement. I need to quit. I am amazed that I kept that little tin for so long. I never had health issues; I had freedom issues. I cannot even begin to tell you how many times I went out at some ungodly hour in the middle of horrible weather just to get a tin. No More! I got my money and freedom back. I got ME back. For you new people out there, take heart! It CAN be done; I did it. So can you. Firstly, post roll every damn day. There have been many times where that roll post was all that saved me from caving. Secondly, learn how addiction works. The average crave is over and done in three minutes, no shit. Surely you can suck it up and bear it for three minutes, right? Sure you can - we all can! Thirdly, don't ever think you can have 'just one' - NOPE! It's a drug addiction, not a bad habit. There is NEVER just one! As for my future here, I'm going to stick around for as long as the board will have me. I'm also going to go into the new groups and start working with newer quitters, now that I have what it takes to sustain a good quit. I hope you'll join me.
  2. 7 points
    Not sure why I thought of this site today but thought I would stop in and it says I'm at 6,001 days. That is a little over 16 years. Looked up my hall of fame speech in the archives and was reminded of all the great people that helped me get to that first 100 days. Without those guys I would of never made it. quitting is the best decision you can make. If you fall off the horse get back on and keep going. Take it from someone who knows, it is worth everything you will go through. Good luck to you all.
  3. 6 points
    This is for everyone who comes after me and anyone who came before me,when u are scrolling through these speeches,maybe you'll read this and hopefully it will inspire you,or possibly give you hope or strength,to help you quit or to help you stay quit. I don't have a profound reason for quitting or anything like that. I'm a regular person like all of you,I'm not any different or any better...I to have been addicted to nicotine...I guess I always will be...but my goal is to never put dip in my mouth again. Let me start from the beginning...I had my first dip when I was about 6 yrs old with my cousin who was about 5 yrs older than me,no this is not when I officially started dipping,lol...I puked instantly,cuz I swallowed it like candy. I took my first official chew that started me on a 27 year addiction to the nic bitch. I got a chew from another cousin at the age of 13...we were playing football at the time...then I would put one in doing yard work and stuff like that or farm work. I completely became addicted at 14...I would put one in,when I could,playing football, working,doing anything outside ..even in school,by this time,I would just tuck it in the back and that was it...I was only ever caught 2 times from 8th grade until I graduated. After I graduated,I had one in at work,in the morning,after lunch,up until I ate dinner,after dinner...and after a snack right before bed. As of now, once I'm full,which takes quite a while now,I still do have the urge to put a chew in and right before bed...but the urges and cravings are getting less and less strong. I also have to say here,that once you get through a couple of cravings,you learn how to deal with them and how to cope with them,they also last less and less as time goes on. In my addiction.. I have to say that I have loved nicotine and at times,I have thought that I would never quit ...and quite frankly,I didn't want to,for most of those 27 years. I had tried to quit quite a few times,but I know now that I wasn't that committed. Recently,I had been on another site like this and I caved...I also caved on this site as well...and I was called out for it and the person who called me out,has since quit posting,but I hope they haven't caved. I hope that I can be an inspiration to other people who have had as hard of a time quitting as I have,or anyone who might be a serial quitter...this habit is horrible... it's not wrong to cave, it's only wrong to quit trying to quit. The main reason that I think this quit is for good is because of God and my commitment to stay quit. I have finally let go and let God...he has blessed me with will power,strength, commitment,and the resolve and motivation to stay completely quit. God also blessed me with a great support,great family and my awesome support group that I have found on this site ...I have to say a special thanks to RWM,PMFJ,and STS...you guys have no idea how much you have helped me. I also have to say,be ready for bouts with rage,mood swings and an emotional roller coaster...one thing that has helped me is kava tea for helping to keep me calm and focus tea,which are both in the tea section,next to the coffee section in Walmart. I also learned recently that hypoglycemia,which is low sugar and being hungry can also feel like a nicotine craving ...so don't skip meals ... trust me,this really does help ...another thing is to stay hydrated,drink plenty of water,this also helps....another thing that I have learned is that nicotine eats caffeine,and now that we don't use nicotine,we are now getting every bit of the caffeine that we are drinking,I know for me, caffeine sometimes causes me to be edgy...so plz try to cut back on caffeine...also try to get plenty of sleep...in addition to these,at first you will probably have a hard time focusing...the focus tea mixed with the kava tea helps with staying calm and focused....it does get easier with time...we all have to remember,that we are healing and everyone is going to heal differently and at different rates...the main thing is to keep the crap out of our mouths...and post every day...stay committed to quitting and committed to your brothers and sisters in quit...do whatever it takes to stay quit...do whatever u need to do ...it doesn't matter what you do ..just don't dip...ONE SECOND AT A TIME...ONE MINUTE AT A TIME...ONE HOUR AT A TIME...ONE DAY AT A TIME ...good luck to all of you and God Bless
  4. 4 points
    12 years ago I went tobacco-free. While I used nicotine gum for another 3 months, this is still an important milestone for me, especially since I was nicotine-free for 44 days before finding this forum.
  5. 3 points
    I'm nicotine-FREE Twelve Years today. I only continue to post to encourage others and to remind myself that I once could not make it through a day without constantly - or as often as possible - having dip in my mouth. Since taking the plunge, I've encountered many, many issues and problems such as are common to humans, but not a single one would have been better with a dip in my mouth. Nicotine does not make anything better, it only feeds the addiction and keeps you enslaved. If you are on the fence, be assured that you can face and enjoy life without nicotine - and also eliminate the worry about its consequences. One hour, one crave, one day at a time with a commitment to do anything necessary to stay nicotine-free will pay off with huge dividends. Plus, you have strong support from this band of brothers & sisters. ~Euty, day 4,384 nicotine free.
  6. 3 points
    Kicking Back Flashback to February 2010: Went out for a late dinner with my wife. Woke up in the middle of the night because I had to relieve my bladder. Did so quickly because I wanted to get back to sleep before my mind kicked in. After doing so, while walking from the bathroom back to bed, I started to feel dizzy and saw darkness closing around me. Next thing I knew I was on the floor, coming to, while my wife was next to me, yelling my name. My wife said she was calling an ambulance. I told her she didn’t have to do that. I said I was OK, that it was just a freak accident from getting out of bed so fast and trying to force myself to take a leak quickly. She insisted on calling an ambulance and I kept insisting no. We compromised by me promising that I would make an appointment with the doctor come Monday morning. At the doctor’s appointment, while getting checked out, I’m explaining what happened when I passed out. The doctor removes the stethoscope from his ears and asks “Do you smoke?” I said “No” with a little self-righteous pride. The doctor then asks “Do you chew tobacco?” I thought it odd that he pinned down that question so fast. I hemmed and hawed, forcing myself to utter a barely audible “Yes.” The doctor asks “How long have you been chewing tobacco?” I glance at my wife before looking back at the doctor before answering. “Thirty years,” I whisper. I hear my wife gasp with surprise. It was like admitting to an affair that went on behind her back for that long. The doctor then starts to go on in great detail how chewing tobacco is detrimental to the vascular system and how I have an increased likelihood to have a heart attack or stroke, and that it probably had ‘something’ to do with me hitting the deck. The doctor then asks if I want to quit. I look at my wife again. She doesn’t even look back. I say “Yeah…one of these days.” The doctor discusses quitting options, wants to know if I would like to try any of the prescription methods that he runs through. I tell the doctor I would rather quit by going cold turkey. He asked me how I plan on doing that and I said I would commit to looking in to it. The doctor set up an appointment for a month later, when we could see how things have improved after I had quit. I never followed up on that appointment. I blew off my doctor. Flashback to April 2010: After a couple of months of my wife pestering me every other day, I flushed my can. "I have to do this," I thought. After one day I was crawling out of my skin. I was seconds away from leaving work and driving to the nearest C-Store and basking in the glory of a fresh dip after a long crave when I typed ‘quit dip’ into the google search box. I remember reading Bluesman’s ‘Secret of Our Success,’ and dozens of other Hall of Fame speeches. I could relate to every word. Everything written resonated deeply with where I was in life, and with my tobacco addiction. I wanted to have that freedom and ‘success’ that all those HOF writers were describing. I had tried many times and could not make it stick. I knew this addiction was ruining my health. I knew my relationships with loved ones had deteriorated. I knew my professional life stagnated. I knew my social life suffered. I was addicted to smokeless tobacco and I felt deep shame in that. I did not want anyone to know I dipped and went to great lengths to keep it secret. I also set up my life to ensure I had continual unfettered access to my dirty secret and was not going to let anything interfere. I was astonished to find that nearly all the quitters here felt the same. In the outside world, everyone treated me like I was some sort of weak freak for not giving up such a filthy habit years before, let alone how I could even start such a disgusting habit in the first place. Reading those HOF speeches on that day in April 2010 gave me a spark of hope that someone could understand how much I loved the stuff, how shameful it was for me, and how hard it was to quit. There was, however, proof here that I could quit. I posted roll call and did so religiously for about 200 days. However, around day 300, I gladly decided to march into the store to buy a can, and then stuff my lip. I continued to do so for another six years. I just buried my head in six feet of denial and ignored everything. Screw everyone and everything, I thought. In retrospect, there were warning signs that I wouldn’t make it that go-around: 1) I was not 100% quitting for myself. I mean, I was…and I wasn’t. I wanted good health. I wanted to improve the quality of my relationships. I wanted freedom from anxiety. I wanted people to pat me on the back. I wanted recognition. I wanted to have the success that comes with quitting—the things everybody else talked about—increased fitness, better health, better relationships, more time for interesting hobbies, and more energy to focus on professional endeavors. When those things did not happen fast enough—or not at all. I figured “What’s the use?” It is clear now that I put conditions on my quit. The conditions became more important than the quit. When the conditions weren’t met, I considered my quit a failure. I set myself up. 2) I wanted the symptoms of quitting to go away on MY timeline. The big thing here is the fog. After six months of being quit, I thought the fog was a permanent thing. I could not focus. I could no longer think a coherent thought. I could no longer write anything longer than a badly written sentence. Depression was another significant symptom that crept into my life for the first time after I quit. I thought the depression was a result of quitting and that it was permanent. I concluded that I would rather be dipping than be depressed. Some medications have benefits that outweigh the drawbacks. I diagnosed myself and wrote my own prescription. Small wonder I chose smokeless tobacco to fill the bill. 3) My activity on this site started to dwindle after about day 200 and became just about non-existent soon thereafter. I quit posting roll call. I quit reaching out, or whenever anyone reached out to me, I ignored them. I wanted to be done with the inconveniences of being accountable. I wanted to be done with the inconveniences of quitting, and I did not want anyone else in my business. I had better things to do. 4) Quitting stopped being my #1 priority, if it ever was. It was more like I was trying to fake it before I made it. Faking it began to feel too untrue. It is easy to go astray, but when you are in the middle of it, you do not even notice---everything seems normal until you turn around in circles, lost, alone, and bewildered, asking yourself “Where the hell am I and how did I get HERE?” This website answers those questions, and offers a path out. The path you choose is up to you. Dip wasn’t going to ever make anything better or solve any of my problems. I erroneously believed dip did for me what I would not or could not do for myself. No wonder I became so attached to it. After an additional six years of dip addiction, I came to realize that smokeless tobacco would never work its magic again. It was an erroneous premise to begin with. Quitting doesn't magically solve all my problems either. Just one of them. The rest is up to me. Fast Forward: March 8, 2017 – Today One year Quit. Here’s how I’ve done it: Don’t dip, no matter what. Post roll call every day. Give my word I will not dip today. Reach out personally to other quitters. Offer support to other quit groups. Ask for help. Don’t dip, no matter what. Repeat. Another important thing I’ve done is this: I have established a separate realm for my quit, beyond my personal life; whereby personal issues have no say in the quit matter. I am first and foremost quit today. Everything else is gravy. When I first arrived here, it was my hope to one day offer one hell of an inspirational story---to say I’ve done a triathlon, lost all the weight I need to take off, built my own company, traveled the world, climbed Mt. Everest, wrote the next great American novel, etc., all because I don’t dip anymore. Because I’ve done none of the above, I considered myself unworthy to say anything on the subject of successful quitting. Nonetheless, I have survived a tough run, and I’ve done so without dip for the past year. As I alluded to above, success doesn’t always revolve around my timeline. Also, I must re-consider my erroneous-egocentric-addict’s mind. Success comes in many different shapes and forms. 100 days... 365 days quit are major accomplishments in and by themselves. I’ll take it. I deserve to be here for those reasons alone. I would like to thank those who have supported me and listened to me whine and complain at times. I would also like to thank those who have left their words of wisdom and trials and tribulations in this space. All I can do is pay your service forward the best I can. Thirdly, I would also like to thank our patron and donors for giving us a place to do what was once impossible. And lastly: thank you, new quitters, for reminding me that dip is still out there kicking ass. Today I’m kicking back.
  7. 3 points
    I want to use my Hall of Fame speech to tell you a little bit about my addiction, about my decision to quit, how I quit, and what I might have done differently if I had to do it over again. I will be sprinkling in quotes from other Hall of Famers throughout my speech (in italics) as a way of honoring those who blazed the trail for me. But first I do want to do a short dedication and say thank you to those on QSSN who helped me down the trail. This 100 days quit is dedicated to Dr. Coleman J. Spector, DDS who is my oral surgeon. Yes my trip to go See The Spector changed my life and probably saved my life. I want to thank my quit bro BLG who is the other half of the Angry Quitters – Sick of Slavery team. Having someone like you to call, text or message has been a huge reason why I made it through some of the tougher days. Thanks Brother!! I also want to thank the many supporters that have joined us for roll call these past 100 days. They are: MacDanders, Duf, Chill, MCO, Mongrel, Dodowah, Lucky, jayst, Fish, NoMoreBear, ReDo, TR1960, 86Torker, Sweet Tony, Dave444, Rat, NMG, CraigMac, Jmuir, FES, Stockchart, bflem, Jeffrobd, and Johnny. A special extra shout out to Benpitt and Tiger Refuge who not only post support on our roll call almost every day, but who also join me in the Rage Room from time to time. Finally I want to thank a couple of guys quitting solely on the Facebook QSSN page who regularly message support. Keep up the good work Ben and Tom! My Life as a Dipper The days of dipping in high school seemed so carefree and harmless. I would only have a couple of small dips per day when I was studying or trying to cut weight for wrestling, dip was under a buck per can, and a can would last a week. It was easy to sign that first contract in pencil with my new friend dip. College life brought more freedom, tougher coursework, and a lot of beer drinking. My friend dip wanted to renegotiate its contract with me. This new contract had to be signed in ink and demanded five of six small dips per day, many cans per week, and it had some fine print I never read. When I got my first “big boy” job, dip was right there to congratulate me, but of course a renegotiation of our contract was also requested. This time, dip was asking for larger more frequent dips and for a can a day commitment. Since I now had a real job, dip argued that I could afford it. There was also a lot of new fine print in the contract that was so small that I could not read it. Dip said not to worry about the fine print, and oh by the way this new contract had to be signed in blood. Yea you guessed it. I signed the damn contract. I had pretty much sold my soul. Tobacco is the false friend who stabbed you in the back, robbed you, beat you, raped you, and left you for dead in a gutter on an unfamiliar street, in a country who's [sic] language you don't even speak. – JR January 8.2002 I hear a lot of the guys on this site describe themselves as ninja dippers (either they dipped when no one else was around or they were so discreet about it that no one knew they are dipping). For at least the last ten years of my 30+ years of dipping I have been the complete opposite of a ninja dipper, I was the 1/5 of a can of Timberwolf in my mouth for 15+ hours a day dipper. I dipped loud and proud and I dipped anywhere and everywhere. Not that I was ever rude about, but if other people didn’t like that I was dipping, then that was just tough shit, because nothing was coming between me and my dip (I was such an addicted asshole). It’s so freaking sad that in half the photos that were ever taken of me (unless they gave me warning) I look like Bubba from Forest Gump or one the Yanomami tribe (Google it or see the photo in the Rage Room). For the last several years of my addiction it was so bad that the only times during any given day that I did not have dip in my mouth were; meals, exercise and sex. And the sad part is that I rushed through all three of those things, just so I could put that poison crap back in my mouth as soon as possible (pathetic addict). I could write volumes regaling stories of how pathetically addicted I was and how sometimes my compulsion to dip would own me, but one story says it all. There were six of us out for a business dinner at best steakhouse in Louisville. An agent I work with was buying the dinner and our mutual client was buying the wine – so I was being treated. The appetizers were wonderful, and then the $55 steaks arrived cooked to perfection. One of the clients is an oenophile and is treating us to $250 bottles of wine. When the meal ended I was stuffed with delicious food and amazing wine and jonesing for a dip. But some folks wanted coffee, so we had to stay at the table a while longer. And oh yes I did. This pathetic dipper loads up his lip (good three finger pinch) right at the table and then takes one of the empty bottles of wine from the table to use as my oversize spitter. As an addict I had hit rock freaking bottom. Deciding to Quit Quit now or quit at the urging of your oral surgeon. I did it the latter, you be smart and do the former. – JR April 17, 2002 I had been having some mouth issues for a while so my regular dentist sent me to an oral surgeon. It was a Thursday afternoon when I went to go See The Spector (Dr. Spector DDS – Oral Surgeon). My blood pressure is off the chart because I am so nervous. With a mirror in my hand and a bright light in the hand of The Spector, we began to examine my mouth together. Neither of us liked what we were seeing. Occasionally he would take the light out of my mouth and it would shine in the mirror that I was holding, and kind of blind me. The blinding light in the mirror had an eerie look, as it kinda looked like the light at the end of a tunnel. This light was not a ray of hope. Nope, it was an oncoming train. A speeding train of tooth loss and gum grafts at the very best and at the worse - squamous cell carcinoma. I left Spector’s office in shock and headed for some time in the barber chair. Normally I would have a quick dip as I walked the 5 blocks to the barber, but on this day the can remained in my pocket. I grabbed a lollipop at the barbers, and as I sat in the chair getting clipped sucking on that lollipop, I made the decision quit dipping. When I left the barber, I went across the street to Walgreens and bought a big bag of lollipops and two boxes of nicotine gum. I went home and looked in the mirror. I was getting older and my gums were in bad shape, but at least my hair looked good (hehe). It was then that I gave myself the lecture of my life and the law was laid down. I said fine, if you need nicotine that badly, then I give you permission to be addicted to nicotine gum for the rest of your life. But you will never ever ever put tobacco in your mouth again. Do you hear me you selfish self-destructive addict? Yes, I heard myself loud and clear and Day 1 was born. Someday, you will regret not quitting. Don't pass up that golden moment, when you are ready to quit… – olywa mike March 18, 2002 So I had my lollipops and nic gum, but I had no idea what the hell I was doing or what I was in for. I knew I needed help, and fast. I had found a couple of other sites on the internet geared for people trying to quit smokeless tobacco, and started reading some articles and posts. It’s weird how constantly reading what others went through in quitting helped me get through the first couple of days. I did come to realize that my use of NRT was against the “rules” of these other quit sites and I was not welcome in their quit groups or chat areas. Thank God I went back to my search results and found QSSN. It was exactly what I needed, and I joined my quit group on the 4th day of my quit. My use of NRT I am not an advocate for NRT and I don’t necessarily recommend its use as a quit aid. That being said I am unapologetic about using for the first part of my quit. My goal was to quit using tobacco – PERIOD!!! I was up front about my NRT use with my quit brother, but other than that I never really brought it up. I think everyone is a little different in the way they want to approach their quit, and I will support the cold turkey quitters and those wearing a patch on their arms with equal enthusiasm. Do I think NRT helped me? I’m not really sure. Maybe for the first week or so, but in general I found nic gum to be quite unsatisfying. Right after my second week of using the gum, I just found that I wanted it less and less. Quite by accident, I missed having a piece in the morning one day, so I had my first piece of the day in the afternoon. The same thing happened the next day. The third day of that week my first piece of nic gum was after the evening meal. The forth day I made it almost until bed time. On day 22 of my quit I just stopped using nic gum altogether. However, whatever it takes to quit you should be willing to do. Beat this addiction FIRST, then worry about gum, patches, fake dip, etc. As long as there is no snuff in your mouth, you will be on the road to beating the addiction. No one here thinks any less of you if you use quit aids, and there are no special prizes for quitters that went cold turkey. 100 days is 100 days. Just quit. – Trying July 15, 2002 What I Would Have Done Differently Timing: Timing is everything, and my timing for quitting dip sucked big time. Yes I decided to quit dip as a spur-of-the-moment decision two days after my father’ funeral. Yep I buried my dad, and decided to give up a 35-year habit two days later. Not a wise choice, as I had no idea the grief that I was feeling over the loss of my dad could be eclipsed tenfold by the grief of the loss of my “best friend” (dip) (see below for more on grief). My second error in timing was launching my quit on December 1st as the stressful holiday season was approaching and the days were the shortest - bringing on the seasonal depression. I weaned myself off of NRT on the 22nd of December so I timed a perfect nic withdrawal right at Christmas with the families. OH YEA, then I messed it up even more by planning a dream vacation to Easter Island with my significant other in mid January. Nothing like going halfway around the world to one of the most beautiful places on earth just to be an angry irritable son of a bitch (sorry mom). I know that timing is often used as an excuse not to quit (i.e. things are just too hectic for me to quit right now). However, one should be conscious that making too many major life changes at one time is not a good idea either. Advanced Preparation: Preparation is key!!! My quit was pretty much: FIRE, Ready, Aim. I liked dipping (or at least my addiction led me to believe I did) so had never really wanted to quit before. Sure maybe I thought that I should quit, but I had never made any steps towards actually quitting since I really did not want to quit. So here it is a Thursday afternoon and for the first time in my life the “brass ring of quitness” comes into view and it’s within my reach. I grab that brass ring and pull with all my might, and I have done it – I have quit dip. Great, I have quit, so now what do I do? I have no idea. Wish I would have read Bluesman’s articIe before I pulled the trigger. You must be willing to do literally ANYTHING to free your mind! In my case, the "do anything" approach has meant using herbal chews, chewing gum, hard candies, Altoids, prayer, eating snacks, taking walks, drinking water, working out, jogging, leaving work early, changing my routines, drinking more coffee, going to church in the middle of the day, and spending hours reading and posting on this website. If you need nicotine supplements (gum or patch) or an anti-depressant prescription, then go get them, right now. In fact, have everything ready on Day -1, so that you have these things ready when you need them. And tell everyone about your decision and your commitment. "Burn every boat," so to speak, so that you cannot break your commitment without embarrassment, without publicly admitting failure, and without swallowing your pride. Make it more difficult to cave that to remain true to your commitment (see "do anything" above). In fact, invest so much time and effort into your commitment that you absolutely HAVE to stick it out. Every step away from a prison cell is a step towards freedom. – Bluesman 2002 Being Prepared for the Grief: I was totally and wholly unprepared for the grief and mourning over the major life change of giving up dip. I was ready for withdrawal symptoms, but the feelings of grief and mourning over the loss of dip were/are so overwhelming that I will post a separate rant about it in the Rage Room. But for right now, I will tell you that only the death of my dog can compare with the emotional pain and sense of loss that I felt with giving up dip. Yes, I grieved immensely for my father, but in reality, dad and I talked a couple of times a month on the phone and saw each other a couple of times a year. My dog was always by my side for 13 years and was my constant companion, and when he died it was like having part of my heart ripped out. Likewise dip was my constant companion for 30 years and was my “best friend” who went everywhere and did everything with me (addiction messes with your mind so much that you think a can of poison is your best friend). When I quit dip, it felt like my best friend had died. I thought I was the only one feeling a sense of mourning and grief over the loss of dip, but I would come to find out that it is way more common with smokeless quitters than one would think. It’s OK to grieve. A major part of our lives (dip) is gone forever (died). We just need to remember that our association with dip had to die, or that we were going to die from our association with dip. The emotional or daily life aspect of dipping was harder for me than any physical symptoms. Hell at one point I felt like I was mourning the death of a friend, literally. What I was really mourning was the fact that I had attached dipping to so many good memories that dipping itself had become my emotional tie in to the past, and THAT'S what was bullshit. – Tiger Refuge May 16, 2013 Being Prepared for How Long the Irritability and Depression Might Last: I must say that I was also totally unprepared for how long it can take for the brain to “heal” itself after years and years of nicotine abuse. I was not prepared for the depression and I was not prepared for the irritability, short temperedness, and rage to continue for so long. It was only by reading so many posts on this site from other quitters and by reading some posts on smoking cessation sites that I began to realize that it could be a very long road to full recovery. Everyone’s quit and everyone’s brain is different. For some, they all good after a couple of months, but for others it can take years to feel close to “normal” again. I suspect that I am one of those people for whom it will take a longer time to fully heal. Just knowing that is half battle. So, I will acknowledge that my brain chemistry is still messed up, I will not set arbitrary timelines for my recovery, and I will keep my chin up and not use any tobacco products One Day at a Time. After a few days of hell, a few months of being a miserable prick and a few years of regular cravings I am finally coming out on the other side. I tell you all, find support, kick it completely and hold on. You will come through it. Do not get caught comparing your quit to others. When at 100 or 200 days people told me they really were not struggling anymore I wanted to punch them in the face. For me, it did not let go quickly, but it is now [at 1,000 days]. I have a dear friend on this site who past 1,000 days is still struggling like I was 200 days ago. I called her yesterday to tell her to have hope. We have lamented to each other so many times “why isn’t this easy yet? I hope the fact I am finally getting there can be an inspiration that hope springs eternal. – Tamado September 2007 Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed. Regards, Bruce
  8. 2 points
    Ladies and Gentlemen, I have heard moans and complaints that using the site is difficult, especially while using a phone. Here is the good news: Despite what you've heard, this site is MUCH easier than it used to be, especially on a phone, I promise! I am going to post two YouTube tutorials on how to use the 'copy and paste' function for two types of phones: iPhone and Android. Copy and paste is really all you really need to know! Don't worry about using the Quote tools. You don't need to use them...forget about them for now. Copy and paste is all you need to know on your laptop or desktop too, but I'm assuming you already know how to use those functions (hint: on laptops or desktops use CTRL + C to copy text, and CTRL V to paste). If you are posting roll call on a phone or laptop/desktop: 1) Go to the bottom of the last page of the thread you are posting roll call to; copy all the text (& pics) from the last post. 2) Paste the copied text into the box at the bottom of the page where it says 'Reply to this topic...' 3) Edit the text however you want BEFORE you hit 'Submit Reply' . The videos below show you how to copy and paste with the two main types of phones (it's actually easier than depicted in these videos because you don't have to open or close apps, you just copy the last post and paste in the 'Reply to this topic...' box at the bottom of the page. iPhone Android
  9. 2 points
    March 3, 2019 This is not a dead site. We are an active community of people who have quit smokeless tobacco. Our mission is to provide a support network for those who want to quit. Anybody who wants to quit is welcome. If you are thinking about quitting, you can register, read, ask questions, look around as much as you like. You can remain anonymous. If you know you want to quit, I would suggest you jump in today. You can quit this instant. Why wait? Do not give your addict-self a chance to talk you out of it. It's simple and works like this: 1. Find your quit group (the newest one is currently http://forum.qssn.org/index.php?/forum/259-june-2019/). 2. Type in your name (handle), and promise not to use today. We add our days quit just to keep track, but we are all equally getting through one day without using. 3. Do the same thing the next day. 4. Repeat. Simple, but not easy. If you have questions, you can ask in the space below. Or you can send any member a message. I would be happy to meet you on the boards. -rwm3892 - 726 days quit and I promise no nicotine today.
  10. 2 points
    TR speaks for himself; we're a perfectly sane an ordinary lot of addicts in denial here....
  11. 2 points
    Hi im corey im new here on day 4 so far so good avid trout fisherman hence the name
  12. 2 points
    I have been gone a LOOOOOOOOOOONG time! I don't recognize the names I'm seeing! Glad to see you all still carrying on the fight. If I make it 5 more days, I'll be claiming 10 years Copenhagen-free. Keep coming back, boys. This site saved my ass and it can save yours if you do what we suggest.
  13. 2 points
    Quit yesterday. I began my addiction in the late 70's as a teenager, quit in 1992, started back up in 1998. I'm done.
  14. 2 points
    Major congrats to you for 10 years of kicking Copenhagen to the curb. Don't be a stranger. We have a good group of quitters. A much smaller group, but we're making it work. We always appreciate the oldtimer's support.
  15. 2 points
  16. 2 points
    I have a mate who is always denying that he dips. "I just have one every once in a while to prove that I don't like it." No seriously that's what he says, word for word. That's like being sober but just slammin some vodka to prove that you really don't like the taste. Any excuse for an addict right? I know I had volumes full of excuses until you stop trying to con the con man that is yourself. I can lie all the time except to that dude deep down who knows allll the lies.
  17. 2 points
    That’s the way I want to fucking die. Yep, with a big ole fat one stuffed in my lip. Fuck you, fuck society, fuck anyone in my way; this is the life I chose. Burry me with a tin in my pocket and some on the side for my voyage into the after life.. Sounds good doesn’t it. It sounds tough, doesn’t it? You’re lying out your fucking ass and I’ll tell you why: Ok, Mr. Tough Guy, when you’re laying there in your bloody puke, curled up in a fetal ball, does it still sound good? When you’re in so much fucking pain that morphine won’t even take the edge off, is that what you were talking about? How about the raw shit and blood running down you leg from colon cancer that smells like death itself. How about the tube sticking out of your disfigured face, where your mouth used to be. Is this the fucking picture you had in your head? As a retired Fire Fighter / Medic I can tell you for a fact, every one of you bastards are begging for your life in the end. Not so tough now are you asshole. You’re lying out your ass and you know it! I see you looking in the mirror at your bottom lip, look carefully at that spot. That’s the fucking spot that’s gonna kill ya. Nope, not right away, but after about 4 surgeries, horrendous pain, and a face that’s worse then any burn victims. That’s a real nice legacy to leave your kids, isn’t it Dad! You, with half a Hulk face, shitting the bed. Go ahead you selfish ass, stuff another fatty in there and play Russian roulette. Go ahead pack a good one in, wedge it in with your tongue, this may just be the one to cause cancer and ya don’t want that from a half ass dip. Make it worth your life, because it just may take it. Is this the dip that’s going to give you cancer? How many rolls of the dice will God give you? How many times are you going to hear the click of an empty cylinder? You said you wanted to die that way, didn’t you? Liar. No, one, and I mean no one, wants to die that way. I know it’s just easer to keep repeating that macho bullshit. You’re scared to try and quit aren’t you? You tried before, suffered and caved in like a pussy didn’t you? Yep, it’s defiantly easer to repeat that lie. You can’t take the pain of the quit, you have to much stress, yada yada yada, I’ve heard them all. Ya know why? Cause I was you, for 30 stupid fucking years. Well, almost you, just one major difference, I quit. On August 09, 2007 I quit the slow death. I quit playing Russian roulette, I acknowledged my addiction and did the best thing I have ever done for my life. I FUCKING QUIT! Every time I look at my Daughter and Son I count my blessings. I have survived one hell of a life, and now, for the first time in a very long time, I am in control. I own my destiny. I own my body. No one person, no object, no drug, and no poison can control me anymore. You too can win your life back. The way to freedom is simple, the process is a motherfucker. If it was easy you would be quit now, wouldn’t you? Let me ask you, why are you reading this? You want to quit, don’t you? Well let’s do it, and do it together. Join me and hundreds of others who have won, and let’s get you quit. Now, before you go and say that stupid ass lie again and pull that trigger, because one of these times IT WONT GO CLICK! Stevethebuilder Nov 07 quit group
  18. 1 point
    Drummz, From one nicotine addict to another, I'm an avid bow hunter and my quit date is Oct 26, just before the best part of the hunting season for my area. I still hunted the rest of the season without dip, believe it or not life without dip is possible, in fact it is so much better. Not making sure you have enough dip to get you through the day, no making sure you have a bottle handy when you want it, not can rubbing a ring in your pants, the list goes on and on. It's a matter of learning to do your favorite activities without a pinch or smoke. Those activities will be just as good, if not better, without that ball and chain weighing you down. I hope you are here to quit for you, I wish you the best and will be looking for you in the June HOF group.
  19. 1 point
    That's the addiction talking. Life without nicotine sucks at first, but it gets better. And all the things that are fun with nicotine are fun without it. The addiction wants to stay in control and is trying to create the illusion that it brings all the fun to the table. It's BS, it's only along for the ride, and then only if you let it be.
  20. 1 point
    Welcome to your quit. The cigar debate was very much a part of my quit too. I wanted to share with you a post from my new quit group that I posted when I first came back. I say new quit group because I use to be a part of the LTQ back in '07, but threw away a quit of over 780 days. The crux of my fail was a cigar. Here's the story... I'm back after a long hiatus. I was originally a member of the LTQ. The last time I posted an actual number of days quit to roll call was on 11/17/08 with 780 days under my belt. I continued to post for another 5 days so I'm guessing I made it to 785 days quit before throwing it away. Two of the last 3 posts I made to the site are very telling. I was craving tobacco/nicotine, and thought that I could smoke a cigar without getting caught back up in the addiction. There were obviously doubts, but I distinctly remember the day I walked into the cigar store and bought a cigar and smoked it in one of the oversized leather chairs. When I left I bought a few more to take home. The rest is history. I smoked more cigars, then was right back on the dip so I could continue to feed my addiction while at work. I spent the next 10 years feeding my nicotine addiction, doing more damage to my body, being enslaved to the drug, and wasting over $15,000 more on my addiction. Please trust me when I say that cigars, at least for me, lead right back to the addiction in full force. No amount of nicotine is ever enough once it's in the system. I've copied and pasted below the 2 posts that I referenced earlier. Posted November 20, 2008 I've been craving cigars as of late. I think it's a combination of the cooler weather, approaching holidays, and the fact that I finish my program in just a couple of weeks. I was picking up some Bourbon at the local package store today and ended up with my nose in the walk in humidor filling my nostrils with the humid smell of aged tobacco leaves and quickly realized that was a stupid move. If I ever fall, it will be a premium hand rolled cigar that takes me down. Posted November 21, 2008 I've encountered the same thing. I went into chat last night looking for a bit of support, something I haven't had to do in well over a year, and when I brought up my issue, I was met with "cigars are no big deal", and a confession that they smoke them. I had to bail out of there as I was on the brink of heading back to the ABC Store's humidor. It still sounds appealing this morning, but the feeling is not as strong as it was yesterday.
  21. 1 point
    I hear you Drummz, I was also a once a month cigar guy before my quit. It seems like a lot to give up but as I'm guessing RWM pointed out, they're both nicotine and you'll have to give up both to make this work. For me, it was obviously tough the for first few weeks to give up chewing. But once I committed to it and made it past the first month, I really didn't miss the cigars - probably because I put them into the nicotine category with dip and trained myself to despise any form of nicotine. I still get craves once in a while for chew, but as far as the cigars go I find it pretty easy to use the Nancy Regan method and just say no . Good luck in your endeavor and hope to see you posting up day one soon. Tank p.s. I just figured out how to clear out messages from my profile, so I can now accept new personal messages
  22. 1 point
    Stop in and introduce yourself.
  23. 1 point
    Welcome Trout! Stick around. We are a bit strange, but we are quitters! Go to the May 2019 group in the pre hof group.
  24. 1 point
    Howdy, Euty! Good to see you again, too!
  25. 1 point
    Good to see you again, SerenityMan! Twelve Years here and still posting, hopefully as an encouragement to newbies on the Freedom Train.
  26. 1 point
    12 years ago today, I quit using Copenhagen and any other nicotine products. October 1 is a great day to quit. I highly recommend you quit today if you haven't already. Thanks goes to everyone on QSSN, but especially to my quit brothers in the LTQ (Jan 2007 quit group). I'm not on the site much anymore, but I'll still drop in from time to time just to say hello. And I highly recommend the newer quitters to spend as much time as possible on the site, reading and posting and getting to know other quitters.
  27. 1 point
    Good to see you, too, Euty! Glad to see you're still about a month ahead of me. Never want to pass you, buddy!
  28. 1 point
    Outstanding! I never think about it anymore, but... I had quit for years before and started up again, so I believe we still have to be vigilant. When I say never, I mean nearly never, sometimes at a weird moment I think about it, its extremely rare, but like chopping wood for example. Or at certain times after barbecue. Its there, but really tiny now. I feel for the new quitters and those coming back after relapsing, its a hard routine.
  29. 1 point
    Thanks for the update. Now we have to wait for that next bridge. We'll be here for you as much as it is possible on an online forum. This is a pretty good place to vent. You could go to one of the quit groups and post roll call too. You'll have some additional support there.
  30. 1 point
    New to the forum. I have a white patch on my tongue for three weeks that refuses to heal. I’m a former smoker that’s been dipping for 20 years now. I’ve scheduled an appt with an oral surgeon next Friday to biopsy. The waiting is killing me. I fear I’ve found this forum too late. I’ve just thrown my last can away with hopes this is just a scare. I’ll keep the forum posted. In the meantime would appreciate any words of wisdom to stay quit. I hate living like this.
  31. 1 point
    Well I’m back from the oral surgeon. Surgery scheduled for the 20th. He didn’t like what he saw and wants to completely excise and then biopsy and determine next steps. I’m scared. I asked him what happens if it comes back cancer and he said there’s a whole decision tree and to cross each bridge as we come to it.
  32. 1 point
    Just threw the can in the trash last night. Has not been the best morning so far, but getting through it.
  33. 1 point
    Congrats Eutychus! What an accomplishment and so glad you’re here as a voice that this does work and quitting is possible to current quitters and those new who are debating if they should stop dipping today.
  34. 1 point
    Thanks for the head's up, Thunder. We promote the concept that we are dip addicts for the rest of our lives, and quit only for today. It's not easy to actually believe that. It's a crazy ass-addiction that defies time and reason. Huge congrats to you for keeping the lip clear of dip for 17 years, one day at a time.
  35. 1 point
    Am on day 4 fighting hard thanks Euty that helped
  36. 1 point
    I finally realized that chewing only feeds the nicotine slave-master, nothing else. There's only false joy in being a slave. Euty ~ 4,244 days nicotine FREE!
  37. 1 point
    A calculators tells me that I spent over 12,000 days of my life as a tobacco chewer. Thanks to this website and the support of its members, I'm now over 100 days without a dip. Thats the longest since I was probabley 16 years old or so. Still, its only one day at a time...one decisoin not to dip at a time. Its not easy by any stretch but I do believe it really is just that simple. Thanks for the support here, Lads. I doubt this would be possible for me to make it this far without it....NDT.
  38. 1 point
    Why and how I started chewing is nothing special. I was 19 and thought it was a cool way to drop some pounds. Since age 22 i tried quitting. I tried cold turkey, cutting back, Chantix, telling everyone I know I'm quitting, and praying. I don't think I went a full year without trying to quit once. I lied about quitting when i got a job, married, had my son or turned 30. I'm 30 as I wrote this, and the reason I quit was none of the above. I got tired of being weak. I got tired of being strapped for cash, but still spending $4 a day on chew. It didn't help with weight. I've been 220 and chewed, and 260 and chewed. It doesn't help long term. Quitting was the damn hardest this I ever did. But with the help of the guys on this site I finally found the support I need to quit. (big thanks to CraigMac, I would have caved day 3 without him). Three weeks into my quit I wrote the following: "At this point, I only think about dip when I'm doing something that used always involve dip. I can chew ice, some beef jerky, or sugar free life savers and get through it....but I needed a different trick to get through the first week....To those going through a tough first 10 days see if you can try this.... - I said to my self : make through 1 day and then you can dip if your that messed up over it. -make it Through 3 days and let the nicotine out of your body, then you can dip again if you feel you can't live without it. -make it through 5 days and see how you feel. If you don't like life without it the fine. - make it through one week and show yourself you don't need it....you can always dip again it's not going anywhere. .......After 2 weeks I truly no longer feel the want to dip. The first week it felt like I was missing something. That crazy technique worked for me, but it would be no way to live forever. To dip again even once is no longer an option. I have read stories on here of people who quit for a year the dipped just once, and another 10 years go by before the next quit. Well now I happy to say I'm done! That crap sucked, took much money and time out of my life, and I constantly thought it was going to kill me. So to wrap this long sorry up. If you want I to try a quit and reading this, just quit for 10 days. You might look dip as disgusting after that and be on a road to freedom.... If not fine, there will be plenty of the crap available because there is a ton of us enjoying a quit life"...... Man was I excited. But it is hard to remain quit. It is better, but the fight is far from over. I fear caving, and taking this battle one day at a time is the only way to really fight. I didn't cave today, and I'm gona wake tommorow and fight the NB again. Thanks for your support and reading, Mark
  39. 1 point
    As I stated in the C&C Quit Factory quit group this morning, this is not the end it is only the beginning. While I do feel a little sense of accomplishment with reaching 100 days quit I still realize I need to stay focused and stay humble. And most importantly I must keep the ODAAT approach to my quit. During these last 100 days, I not only stayed quit but I also started to live a better lifestyle. I started to become more active, I started to actually live life. It might be difficult for some of you to truly realize, but as a closet dipper, the NB totally controlled me. I know it controls us all but being a closet dipper, I refrained from going to most functions, I refrained from doing just about anything that would not involve stuffing my face with a dip without ANYBODY around. My life was out of control. I had no social interaction, other than work. In fact, all I did was work and of course, dip! Since I decided to change my life, things have really turned around for me. I can honestly say this is one of the happiest times of my life. Not only because I've given up dip, but also because I've started to live my life on my terms. I know a lot of you have your different reasons for quitting but I quit because I wanted my freedom back. I was tired of the dip mind screwing me all the time. I was tired of being an overweight, out of shape, lazy physical education teacher. Oh yea, that's right. I lived a terrible life yet I taught kids to live a healthy life! What kind of hypocrite does that? I didn't care, all I cared about was the can and being alone to stuff my face. When I first started my quit, I weight around 260lbs. I've never been overweight before these last few years when the NB took TOTAL control of my life. I'm proud to say as I type this out, I'm now at 200lbs. Yes that's right, I've lost 60 pounds during my first 100 days of my new life. I think I'm more proud of that then I am of my 100 days quit. Not sure why but I am. I guess the reason for my rambling right now, is to let all of you know, no matter how much the NB has control of you, you can quit. You can have a better life. You can make the most of each day. I'm living proof of that. All you need to do, is quit for today. I know it sounds cliché but its so true. Just quit for today. Take control of what you can control and that is right now, that is today. I go into so many quit groups that are empty after those quitters have reached the 100 day mark. I don't get it. How can we be so committed to our quits for 100 days then just fall off? Like its all over. Like the NB will automatically stop coming around. I know exactly why . We all have this big idea that 100 days is the end all GOAL. I like sports so I'll compare it to a sports situation. You have teams that work their butts off to win a championship, to be on top of the world (100 days quit) and once they get there. The work is over. The goal has been accomplished and there is nowhere to go from here. I tell everyone, that ask, about my weight loss, losing the weight wasn't the toughest part, the toughest part is maintaining that weight loss. Trying to keep motivated now that I've reached my weight goal. Like that team that just won the Super Bowl, its hard to stay on top. Its hard to maintain that greatness but that's where the real work comes in. I know my quit isn't over. I know I have a long way to go but I know its possible to continue being quit ODAAT. For those of you that are reading this that need some motivation or encouragement. Listen, since 2012 (its 2015 right now) I've been a "Day 1" quitter for more times that I can recall. It NEVER stuck with me. But eventually it did. During those first few weeks that really suck, I just told myself, if I didn't quit this time, who knows when I would attempt to quit again. The life of freedom is way better than any day of dipping. As I told a friend the other day, if being a dipper was better than being quit; I would have went back to dipping a long time ago. My point is, if you want to quit more than you want to dip, you will. Good Luck on your journey. You will be a better person for quitting and most importantly you will get your life back. Lastly, I would like to say thanks for the outpouring of support. It really left me speechless. The excitement people show on here for others success is truly remarkable. You don't find that with a group of strangers very often, but then again, that's what makes this place so special. Good Night gents and I will see you all on day 101! Respectfully, CraigMac
  40. 1 point
    This isn't my first time down the quit road. ....The less I know... I discovered this site 4 days into my most recent quit. A day later the "fog" rolled in and I spent hours on this site every day. I woke up looking forward to logging in and seeing all my quit buddies do the same. I posted pictures of hot chicks for other quit groups, and even picked our very own "Jackie C.". Go check her out in the August 2014 group. If you catch us on Friday, you'll meet "Frannie". She is our mascot for Flamethrower Fridays. I loved reading the posts from TigerRefuge, Steve50, Tophook, and of course my quit brothers Cogline, T-Sand, Fightback, and my July 2014 quit buddy Freight Train. All of us made it to the HOF, only Cog, FT and myself are still there. I needed those dudes to help me. I needed them to carry me. The truth is I had a network of accountability that helped me stay quit and in my darkest hour, my phone rang and it was Tiger. I didn't reach out to him, he reached out to me. I'll never forget him telling me, "you'll never wake up regretting you stayed quit". We talked for nearly an hour. The struggle is real, it is daily, and if you stay quit, you will always face a struggle that will make you want to give up on yourself and your quit. The truth is though I feel like it is MY quit. I WANT this for myself! I could not wait to get to 100 so I could be HOF but then I did and then I didn't know what my speech would say. The truth is, the longer I am quit, I feel like the less I know. I don't think about it as much anymore and the cravings are few and far between. I can't give you anything original because everything I know came from my quit brothers and this site. My quit is a product of the support from this site and my determination. With every ounce of my being, I want to be and stay quit. So to my quit brothers who have helped me get to over 500 days, this is dedicated to you. Thank you! Sincerely, Mike Baker
  41. 1 point
    My journey started as many did. A teenager hanging out with the older guys trying to fit in. Red Man, Days Work and Copenhagen. Dipped in school, sports, work, everywhere. Woke up wanting a dip. Spit a dip out right before I fell asleep every night. Nasty smelling spitcups were everywhere. My dogs were always knocking them over, wow what a stinky mess. My dear wife wouldn't kiss me for 30yrs but the hold the nic bitch had on me was stronger than the desire for my wife's kiss. Sad, isn't it? I never had a quit last more than 24 hrs that I can recall. I 'thought' I wanted to quit but looking back, I know that I really didn't. I started a 'gradual' quit by switching to Skoal pouches. That might have helped but the desire was still there. That lasted about two years. Once I finally decided that it was over between us, the nic bitch turned up the heat. It was hard getting through the first day. Hard the second day. Then I failed. I was determined not to let this setback stop me so I quit again but I got some nic replacement tablets. That kind of helped but in my mind it was still nicotine and I was not happy about just replacing one flavor of poison with another. Nicotine is such an insidious drug. I searched the internet and read a bunch of testimonials about a product called Final Smoke. Liquid and tablets. That stuff really took away my cravings. I used it for less than a month and I was good to go. It REALLY helped eliminate the cravings. Equally important in my mind was prayer. I know that I could not have done this without the support of my lord, Jesus Christ. He took away the guilt and the pain. He forgave me for the years of abuse that I heaped on my body with this drug. Only then was I able to forgive myself. I found the MintSnuff pouches down at the hippie store. Those satisfied the urge of having something in my lip. Smoky Mountain from WalMart also filled a void. It looked and felt like snuff! I found this website and it helped me with my accountability since I was apprehensive about telling my family that I was quitting. I was afraid that I would fail again. I am coming up on 1000 days quit now. Absolutely no cravings for tobacco after the first month. Really! As long as I dipped and as many times as I failed at quitting by myself, I didn't think that I would see 100 days much less 1000 and I know that there is no way that I could try 'just one dip' without crashing. I still use the 'crutches' (MintSnuff pouches and Smoky Mountain) but I'm OK with that. No tobacco! And, if I forget to take either of those with me or run out, there is no physical craving that makes me run to the store and buy it. I can go days without either and I'm fine. My teeth are white again! You can quit. I will not say that it's easy but many people have quit nicotine. Much has been researched on the mental and physical hooks that nicotine has working against you. Take advantage of that research. Take advantage of the experiences of the great folks on this site that have faced the same challenges as you. What I will say is that it is not all that hard keeping quit after you get over that hump. It may be a week or a month or a year but from what I read, nearly everyone has that hump and once you get past it, it gets easier to say NO to tobacco.
  42. 1 point
    I’m a male, 51 years old, a husband, a father, a college graduate, a professional engineer…and I’m hopelessly and forever addicted to nicotine, even after 7+ years of being quit. I haven’t had any cravings in the past 5 years, but I know that just one dip would put me back into the habit of daily use. Just one. I found this web site on the evening of December 27th, 2006. That was the day after I began trying to quit a 32-year nicotine habit. I hadn’t had a dip 2 days, was in severe nicotine withdrawal, and was searching the internet for any help I could find. I had failed at several quit attempts over the years, but this time was different. I was really and truly serious. I had reached the point where I would rather die than continue on the road to oral cancer. I started chewing tobacco when I was 13 years old. Soon thereafter I began using Skoal, and a few years later I migrated to Copenhagen. I was a can-per-day dipper for most of my 32-year addiction. Rarely was I without a dip. I tried to quit every couple of years or so, but I never made it stick more than a few days. Nicotine always won in the end. But on December 25th, 2006, I decided to try another quit. At 10:00PM, “The Godfather” came on TV, and I took what I hoped would be my last dip. I awoke at 2:00AM, with some of the tobacco still in my mouth (and probably quite a bit in my stomach). I got up, spit out the dip, went to bed, and promised myself I would never ingest nicotine again. The first 3 days were very hard. I was in the middle of a 3-week vacation from work, so I could just concentrate solely on my quit. But still, it was a real battle. I couldn’t sleep much. I exercised, cleaned house, walked through the woods; anything to try and get away from the withdrawal pain. Nothing worked. Many people say that intense weight lifting workouts really help, but I never could get into weight lifting. When I found this web site, I read that the drug Wellbutrin helps reduce nicotine cravings. So I went to my doctor, got some generic Wellbutrin (called Bupropion), and it immediately helped reduce my cravings. It really did help me. But some quitters try it and experience no benefits. I’m just so thankful it helped me. It was about 9 months before I felt “mostly normal” again. By my first quit anniversary, I was feeling “95% normal” again. But I still had occasional cravings until near my 2nd quit anniversary. Don’t get scared reading these quit stories. Yes, it’s hell to begin a new quit attempt. I know it, and you know it. But you can get to the point where you have no thoughts of, or cravings for, tobacco. I never even think about tobacco any more except when I see a dip someone has spit out on the ground. And even then I don’t have any desire to have a dip myself. LIFE CAN BE PERFECTLY NORMAL AFTER YOU QUIT. But it takes time. A few weeks for some; a few months for others. Everybody is different. Chances are that you’re here reading my quit story (and others) because you’re trying to quit yourself, but are having troubles with cravings. And you’re here looking for some inspiration to continue your quit. Well, let me try and give you some. Do you remember when you took your first chew/dip/smoke? How many times over the years of your addiction have you wished you could go back in time and slap that stupid kid and try to talk sense to him about tobacco? Well, if you fail in your current quit attempt, you’ll become that stupid kid all over again. You’ve caved enough times in your life. Now it’s time to really and truly quit. Here’s your (maybe last) chance to make right what that kid did wrong. And you can. Good luck and don’t cave.
  43. 1 point
    I have recently had several members ask me to write down sort of a "what to expect" post. Something that would kind of let everyone know what to expect. I have to admit, I used to do this in individual groups, however, it is really difficult to look back to those early days and remember exactly what I went though and what days I was on when I encountered those things. I will do my best to give you a bit of a "when to look out for this" play by play. And remember, everyone's quit is different. If you don't hit a crave or a FUNK during a time period that is listed, my belief is that it is better to be prepared for nothing than to not be prepared for something. I was at the very end of my group, reaching the HOF a day or 2 before the last day of my month. I had the opportunity to read and see that most members of my group struggled with this, struggled with that around certain days in their quit. I also got to see when things seemed to clear up for them, and see when the journey seemed to level out a bit. I would definitely urge everyone to share their difficult days and their successful days with their individual groups, as that gives others the chance to see that goo things might be around the corner, or that they need to buckle down and prepare for another fight. And also remember, life throws us curve balls from time to time. Stress, for most of us, is a huge trigger, and when something traumatic in our lives happens, often times a major crave accompanies that stress or trigger. The final thing to remember...we have triggers that we associate with dipping. Driving, working out, hunting, yard work, watching sports, etc. We have a year's worth of triggers to fight through. Fall triggers for new quitters will be something you will have to face for the first time, well after you reach 100 days and the Hall Of Fame. The Hall of Fame is not a cure, just a nice milestone to achieve. 1 year is not a cure, again, it is just a nice milestone to achieve. I always focused on any day I could possibly celebrate. Days of 5 or 10, each week, any holiday that may fall, the more days I could celebrate as a milestone, the better. Obviously, each day is a day to celebrate, but day 5, 7, 10, 14, 15, 20, 21, etc...It gave me a short term goal to look forward to, something other than just the next day. And day 100 is just too far away to focus on early on in the quit. Day 1-3 to 5...This is the physical withdrawl period. All sorts of different symptoms. It's the chemical dependency leaving your body. We put years and decades of poison into our bodies. Our body is going to need a few day to get used to this healthy body again, and it needs time to adjust. I looked at it from a standpoint that I poisoned myself for 7 years. I can go 5 or 6 days through "payback". I hurt my body for all that time, I deserved to let my body punish me for my bad decisions for a few days. Physical could be headaches, very bad craves (mental), shakes, sleeplessness, emotional moments, etc. Day10-15...is when you will possibly start to see the "FOG" lift. One of the things I heard many quitters say when the caved was that they needed the dip to concentrate. The chemical didn't help us concentrate any more than a "sober" person would concentrate...going through the chemical withdrawl, our brain is rewiring itself and it needs time to reconnect some things. So some very easy tasks might seem to be Calculus IV level problems to solve. 2 to 3 weeks and that FOG is finally lifted. Day 20-30...You will actually finally hit a stretch where you now understand why the fight was worth it. You will feel great! The craves have subsided, you feel like a million bucks, your confidence is there...it's a very rewarding day to say the least. Shortly after, the craves will come back. This has now become a mental battle with the addiction. 7 years of training my body to ingest the chemical, it's going to take my brain more than just a month to "forget" about it. Dipping, for most of us, was a part of us. We have eliminated that part of us, and it will take a very long time to get over losing that part of us. I look at it like a person who loses a limb. The phantom pain is something they deal with for a VERY long time from what I understand. Our mind doesn't forget too quickly, and the addiction uses that as a weapon in this battle. Days 30-70. A continuation of the great days and the craves. The good news is that the days that you feel great begin to grow in consecutive numbers...at first it might must be a day..then a day and a half, then 2 days, then 4 days...etc. And the crave period in between the good days begins to shrink. A good day, then maybe 5-7 days of craves then a good day and 4-5 days of crave, and so on. Days 75-90...The FUNK arrives, as I referred to it. The FUNK is almost like going back to week 1. The craves seem to get a lot more intense. Sort of like the last ditch effort the addiction tries to use to get us to go back. The FUNK, over time, will dilute in intensity, but it seems to stick around a lot longer than the recent crave sessions (at least it did for me). Some in my group had the FUNK for just a few days. I believe mine hit around day 85 and lasted through 120 or 130. After a few days of the FUNK, it really turned into a minor crave that just would not go away. It was like that gnat or fly that keeps pestering you. You swat at it, you wave your arms, you spin around, you do everything you can to get it to go away, and it just laughs at you and buzzes by your face yet again. IT DOES GO AWAY, but I have seen members just give in to the annoyance and head back to the tin. The next 100 days after the HOF are hit and miss with more sporadic craves or funks, but you have confidence behind you, and experience. You will start to recognize the pattern. The next 100 days, same deal...so on and so on. I really can't tell you when you will hit that day that you don't think about it any more, or when you go weeks or months without a crave...but it eventually comes. I do warn you about a difficult time that I went through between days 500-600. This was stress related to me, as I was purchasing my first house. It was a big and stressful event. Obviously, the addition wanted me to solve the stress with nicotine. I also noticed that several others went through similar stresses during that time frame. We always shared when things were difficult for us, so that we could help each other out. PRIDE tends to get in the way. Some people are embarrassed that if they mention they are struggling or having a difficult time, that they may be perceived as weak. I would rather be called weak and still have my quit than to not ask for help and fail. Over time, I started to notice that others were struggling between500-600 and they were not going through any stressful moments in their life...so that time period may just be another FUNK that most people go through. Since the house, I have dealt with a car accident that nearly took my life, a separation and divorce (that was approximately a 500 day FUNK in itself...and I was quick to have friends here keep tabs on me and checkin on me). And a misdiagnosis for a pretty nasty disease. So, even though I have hit a number of "floors" or 100 day groupings, I have still had my challenges. And I know that there will be more to come. This is an addiction that has no cure, just our ability to maintain it. The moment we get too "cocky" and think we can never fail...that is usually the moment that we take unnecessary and dangerous risks. A final piece of advice. Avoid triggers early on in the quit and throughout the first year. I always dipped when I golfed. I quit during February. I hit HOF in May. I had all summer to golf. I did not golf once that summer...I didn't feel that it was something I wanted to challenge myself with. I wanted to make sure my quit was extremely strong...I could pass up one year of golf. It was better than getting out there, having someone offer me a dip, and losing all those days I had quit. Alcohol was something that I avoided for well over 100 days. I was not about to let alcohol cloud my judgment, even if it was drinking at home...alcohol causes us to make poor choices. No need for me to take that risk. Do what YOU need to do to keep your quit going forward. Some days it feels like we move an inch, other days a mile...but we keep moving forward. That is the key. Progress in a positive direction. Progress to a better life. Progress towards a better YOU!!!! Remember, this is the best recollection that I have of the early days of my quit. And I do know that everyone's quit is different, yet you will see a lot of similarities in quits with others and similar days that you encompass the same symptoms. In the process, focus on the positives...focus on the things you missed out on because you had to have your dip. Amazing sunrises and sunsets. Amazing days I spent with my (now ex) wife...so much of life that I was missing because I was so focused on a tin. Live life now that you have regained it back from the addiction! -Penguin
  44. 1 point
    Hall of Fame Speech Quit Smokeless October 2013 JSPOOLE 100 Days I can’t believe I have done this – I think I started chewing tobacco around the age of 16. Red Man®/ BeechNut ® leaf tobacco was the first. I was introduced to it by workers for my father’s summertime business. What a mistake. Compounding on this was my desire to move south for college. Everyone dipped tobacco in the south (or at least it seemed), especially at the fraternity. For me It was a way to fit in. Northerner and southern on the front porch, spitting, drinking, college, well you know what I mean. In addition, it was long drive home. I can remember having a dip in my mouth for latterly the entire 12 hour drive home and having a spit cup (32 oz) filled to the rim by the time I got home. How gross. For me, college has been done for nearly 25 years. I’m sure there is many other routines, stories, etc which I could tell you about my life as a nicotine addict, but today I want to forget them. I’m done. Today, I have a wonderful wife, nearly teen age kids and a new job. Dipping was involved the entire way… Until, 100 days ago. Yes, I have attempted to quit before, maybe a year or two at times, I don’t really remember, but quite honestly I really never wanted to quit. I enjoyed it. It wasn't until recently that one night during my regular late night ‘routine’ I decided to search my Kindle® for topics regarding quitting. It was a spur of the moment impulse. I’m really not sure what made me do it but at this point I sure am glad. That night I found ‘Nicotine Rage’. It really was quite simple – every story, every anecdote, every statistic, every habit, everything related to my life.; what I did to have a dip, what ridiculous lies I told, what my mouth felt like, what it cost me was all right there. I think I read the book in about a day it was so true. The story and the facts were my life. I couldn't believe it! After reading that book, it scared me, it inspired me, it showed me there are others who had the same feelings, desires, habits, etc, etc. For some reason within a week after finishing the book, I was sitting at work and I remembered the website mentioned in the book – ‘quite smokeless.org’ – I found myself fumbling around it. It was great - I signed up within 5 minutes not really knowing what to expect. Day one, Day two, day twenty, my online folks really keep me going – Maquit, Cow, NopetoCope, Hanksdad, and all the numerous supporters of the PitchQuitters – Including our lovely poster girls kept me going. I think I recall someone else saying they couldn't believe how some online chatboard could be so powerful, but it is. I can remember the FOG, being 15 lbs lighter, the hard days, the travel, the times in the car, etc – but for some reason I never wanted to let the guys down and I did it. I am forever in debt to you all for helping me though this addiction. I don’t want to go back – and quite honestly, I’m continually referencing Quite Smokeless and Nicotine Rage to friends and acquaintances along with its powerful tool – Friends like you! As I move forward, I will continue to visit the site and support other Pre-Hall of Famers on their journey as I am forever thankful for all the help and inspiration others gave me. I fully realize it could just take one slip and back to addiction and I don’t want that for me, my wife and my family. The road continues ………………….nicotine free!
  45. 1 point
    Well, ladies and gentlemen, this is my third HOF speech. I wrote my first HOF speech in June, 2009 after my first meaningful quit. That speech chronicles how I became addicted to dip in the first place and how I was feeling at the time (I'm not going to get into those details since I've already gone over them). I wrote my second HOF speech in April, 2010 when I was posting with the Quit Tanks. First thing's first, the Tanks still have a huge influence on my quit to this day. Their attitude and approach to quitting is something that everyone should adopt. I really wish the regulars still posted daily, because what they bring to the table in terms of humor and morale-boosting is absolutely tremendous. Basically, this speech was about how I was happy to be quit again, but I wasn't proud since I caved. Now, let me bring you up to speed with what has happened since my last HOF speech 3 years ago... I was a Sophomore in college. I was surrounded by dip with all of my friends and roommates, but I persevered and worked hard to stay off of the stuff. Made it through my second consecutive summer without dip, started my Junior year (which was one of the best years of my life. I had a blast that entire year), made it through the entire year without dipping. Started my 3rd consecutive summer without dip, and then about midway through the summer (580 something days or something) and had a blow up with my parents and caved. No rhyme or reason to it. Just got pissed, blind with rage, and allowed myself to quit. Let me be clear. I ALLOWED MYSELF TO CAVE, it wasn't the fight that caused me to do it. I went AWOL after this. Wasn't posting. Wasn't lurking. Just was dipping slowly killing myself, and was happy with that. One day, I think it was in September, I get a text from Ohioman (more on him later). He asked me if I caved. I didn't lie, I didn't try to make excuses, I just told him yes. He asked me to try again, and I said I would in October. I didn't make it that long. Ever since the text message, the thought of quitting was stuck in my head. I quit midway through September. That quit lasted about 120 days or so, and then I caved again. I remember the cave vividly. I came home from an intramural hockey game, grabbed my roommates tin and said, "fuck it" and put in a fatty. There was reason, it was just completely wreckless and I did it. Looking back on it, I still can't think of a reason why I did it. I just did, and that was the end of it. The rest of the semester went well. I did well in my classes, graduated with a degree in Marketing from the lovely Providence College in Providence, RI, moved home and started my job search. Being around my family really made me realize how crazy it was to continue the habit. Hiding it from them, staying up until all hours of the night to make sure nobody would discover me, not wanting to do things with my family so that I would "have time to dip instead" (which is what I thought in my head). I realized that my lifestyle just didn't make sense. I didn't work out because I could be dipping during the time I could be working out. I didn't eat dinner with my family because I knew I could dip freely without them knowing (they would be busy in the kitchen eating and wouldn't bother me). It was absolutely insane, and so, in July, I made the decision to quit. So far, THIS quit has been the most fulfilling one I've had. I started with a new approach. Rather than not being satisfied and giving myself credit like I did in my last quit, I decided to forget about the past and completely hit the reset button. I didn't concern myself with what worked in the past, and what didn't work (frankly what didn't work in the past is that I was a fucking idiot, but that's a whole other can of worms). I just started fresh and treated each day like it was a victory, just like I had done in the past. One thing that did change is that I wanted to make sure that I was more helpful to new quitters since I had been there before. I did it, and it helped me get in touch with how I was feeling, and allowed me to have some more clarity in my own quit. In essence, I was helping my quit by helping others. In the winter months, I went through very deep depression. I was missing my friends from college, the days were short, the nights were long, and every day I woke up with a helpless feeling of loneliness. And yet, through all of that, turning back to dip NEVER crossed my mind. All I could do was keep telling myself that things would get better and that I just had to keep doing what I was doing. I feel like I have grown as a person more during this quit than I ever have in past quits. I finally know how to deal with stress and sadness like a NORMAL PERSON. I'm unemployed at the moment, but I feel like my life is better now than it has ever been. I've exchanged dip time for activities and am in better shape now than I've been in years. Since my quit started, I have lost over 30 lbs and am running every day, which is something that I never thought would stick. I'm finally at a place where I am truly happy, and that place is without the Nic Bitch. The best part of being here is that I KNOW that things will only get better from here. Once I find a job, I can break out and become self-sufficient. I'm dating again, which is great. I'm only going to continue to lose weight. I've adopted a healthier, more active lifestyle that has been AWESOME so far (I didn't know how I was going to do it in the past). And all of this is going to happen without dip! I have goals that I set for myself, and those goals are in reach and I will accomplish them! At one year quit, I want to be down 50lbs. Next year I want to run a Half-Marathon and a Tough Mudder. These things are going to happen, and I will not stop until they are done. Before I close, I have to thank a bunch of people. First and foremost, Ohioman. We were together in the June 2009 quit group when I started my first quit. He made that quit stick. Me, not so much... But every time I fall down, he is there with support to help me right the ship. You don't know how much you have helped me in the past, but I don't think I would be here today if it wasn't for you. Thank you so much. You've helped me more than you'll ever know. To all of the members of the October 2012 Glue Factory. You guys rule. I love our group's attitude and the fact that most of the members are still posting every day. I hope that never stops. You guys made this quit possible, and you always allow me to bitch and moan (which, I know I am extremely guilty of) without calling me out for complaining. That helps so much to know that I can vent. Thank you all so much. Chuck (UxBridge) and the entire June 2012 Quit Train. You guys are a lot of fun and make it fun to quit. You guys are all still posting every day, which is awesome. Chuck, I enjoy the drunk text exchanges here and there. It's nice to know that I always have someone who can turn my problems into something that I can laugh at. Thank you so much. Jimdaddy- The last super active member of the Quit Tanks. Brings it every day, and has the attitude that makes me want to quit every single day. Keep flippin' those Shit Birds east! Thank you for all that you've done. The Quit Tanks- Most of them are not so active anymore, which sucks, but when they are, it is a treat. They have welcomed me back to the community time and time again with their (sometimes harsh) teasing. I love it and appreciate all that you guys have done for me in the past. Thank you all so much. THE CAT- Most people don't like THE CAT. I think he/she/it is hysterical and makes quitting fun. Your crazy stories and posts always make me laugh, even though I tend to be the butt of the jokes. So much of quitting seems to be "doom and gloom" at times. It's awesome to have someone interject some inappropriate humor to take the edge off. Thank you, whoever you are. There are so many others who have helped me out in the past too. You should know who you are, and know that all that you do does not go unnoticed. Thank you for everything. If you read to this point, then thanks for stopping by. Don't ever give up. I haven't yet. Sure, I've lost battles, but I won't lose the war. Phil 301 Days (and 32.5 lbs)
  46. 1 point
    Spongebob Mantra By: Spongebob (reprinted with permission of the original author) There is only one thing that I must accomplish today, and that is to not chew. If I get other things done today, great. But everything else has second priority for now. Soon I'll be able to focus on those other things too. But for right now, for today, this is the only thing that matters. I won't demand more of myself, and I won't get down on myself for not doing anything else if I don't get to it. This is damn damn damn hard work, and it's the most important work that I have right now. I'll be truly and sincerely proud if I meet no goals today other than keeping that crap out of my mouth.
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