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About Copewquitn

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    Here fishy fishy

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  1. Welcome Solace and congrats on your decision to quit. Your story is similar to my own in that I found this site while stumbling around the internet trying to figure out what I was going through. It didn't take long to realize that my experience followed a pretty common set of struggles and milestones. Click in with a current quit group and you'll find a lot of support. As you recognized, one day at a time is the only way to quit. If it helps however, here's a map of my experiences during the first 100 days. I'd say you're right on track! 1st Hunred Days... Week 1 Week 1 was 80% physical and 20% mental. Both mind and body were in a perpetual loop of gotta have nic/need nic/want nic/gotta have nic/need nic/want nic/..... My only defense was to dig in, lower my head to the task* and repeat to myself don't need it / I can do this / don’t' need it/ I can do this / don't need it / I can do this / don’t' need it/ I can do this... *lots of advice to be found on this: drink lots of water, take walks, deep breaths, get physical exercise, go to bed early, etc. I recommend two web sites to help guide the withdrawal process whyquit.com pei.lung.ca/withdrawl.html Week 2 this was much the same as week 1, except the ratio was reversed to 20% physical and 80% mental. You just need to keep fighting with the same tactics that worked in week 1. Weeks 2-4 This period was mainly a mental battle for me. I was past the physical withdrawal, but was constantly assaulted by triggers. Just keep fighting them off, using the same techniques that carried you through the first 2 weeks. Near the end of this period I developed a new set of craves which revolved around such theories as: - you proved you can quit when you need to, let's go back now - I bet you really can do just one. Come on, don't be a pussy. Try it. - Maybe we can chew for just another month, then pick this quit up again - What if we just dip til the end of salmon season? - Hey, the dentist gave us the thumbs up. We can chew for another 6 months to the next appt - So what's all this talk of "pre-cancerous" cells? Wow, there must be an early warning system. We can chew until we reach that - blah, blah, blah... all a bunch of lies. At the end of 4 weeks I began to feel I was in control. I had learned to prepare for trigger opportunities, and how to efficiently deal with craves. I had also learned to recognize new arguments from the addiction and dismiss them before they turned to real craves. Day 30 Woops, maybe I got a little cocky. Day 30 brought an intense crave that came about from some pretty standard stress at work. Nonetheless this crave dropped me to my knees. I mean I was almost crying at work. That is not me. Luckily I had the sense to get on line and search out some help from my quit group. Fortunately for me Norge was on line and he pulled me through. I was able to pass the nic shops on the way home from work and ended the day nic free. Thanks Norge! Day 50 I reflected upon my quit at this point and realized that I WAS in control. At the same time I recall feeling a bit depressed by admitting to myself that I had quit. I mean... I did it, and there was no turning back. I had beat the physical addiction and learned to control the mental addiction. Caving wasn't an option because I was in control now, and giving in would be an unacceptable failure. These observations showed me that I had truly given up my precious and that was depressing. With this started a period of mourning that lasted about a week or so. Intermingled with the mourning though was a desire to rise above it all and win. I accepted that I was an addict, and most importantly that it was my fault. However, I felt strongly that I needed to discover WHY I am an addict. Shortly afterward I returned to the depression and just felt tired of it all. I was tired of being a dipper, tired of trying to quit, tired of not having my precious nicotine, tired of posting on QS all the time, tired, tired, tired.... I just wanted to go back to my childhood and reunite with a time before my mind and body knew of nicotine. I wanted to go back to my tree house and daydream without the need for nicotine. Not possible however. I had two choices: 1)cave and forget all this quit agony, or 2) stay quit, wait awhile longer and get to a place where hopefully I'll become truly free. I chose option 2. (Option 1 just offers a temporary fix to a permanent problem) Somewhere in here I also had a period where I raged against everything. I was a very (VERY) angry individual. I think I discussed that in the link above. Day 50-80 For the most part this was a period of continued growth, increasing strength where I started to develop an identity as a non-dipper. Craves during this period were less frequent, but more intense from a perspective of emotional longing. The craves shifted from "I want it" to "I long for it, I desire it, I loved it, I miss it". I was dealing with a more raw form of the crave. They weren't the blind raging desire from the previous periods. Instead they had developed into subtle yet cunning emotional desires. Turning down the previous craves meant denying the desire for the moment. Turning down these craves meant accepting the fact that I needed to deny myself of nicotine now and forever. I wasn't just ignoring my precious now. I was killing it, and that hurt. On the other hand it wasn't really that hard. I was on cruise control and it was pretty easy to take my medicine (accepting the fact that nic would not re-enter my life) Day 80 The Funk. The Funked was absolutely unpleasant. It takes different forms for different people, but for me it was a death spiral of brooding self pity, despair, loneliness, depression, fear, anger, etc. Ironically it was touched off by a pretty simple set of circumstances. Kind of like setting a match to dried grass... poof and it was off in full force. This period lasted for 3 days. I was very depressed. I didn't want anything. Nothing. I didn't want tobacco. I didn't want a lack of tobacco. I didn't want to work. I didn't want to stay home. I didn't want to participate in QS. I didn't want to stop coming on line. Somehow this period superceded my quit, and the agony of quitting took a back seat to this new situation. I really don't feel I was at risk of caving during the 3 days. DURING being the operative word. Somehow I knew that my exit from this period would either lead me into a tin of tobacco, or put me on a path toward freedom. I desperately wanted NOT to return to tobacco, and the only thing I knew was to hang onto QS. I sank back into the shadows, blocked PMs, hid my name from being logged on, did not post roll, but I did come on and watch. I was lost in a dark and lonely sea and QS was the only lifeline I knew. I was still in the dark, but at least I had this connection to something. And I knew the other end was attached to the place I wanted to be. So I just hung on as a hermit. Finally something I saw on QS made me snap, and pull my head out. Thanks everybody...one of the truly amazing things about this site is that you never know who you may be helping with your words. So to summarize the funk, I came out. And I did so with the answers I was looking for back at day 50. Basically, "why am I an addict and what can I work on to stay on a clean path". Day 80-100 Cruise control, but became more at peace with the notion of being a non-user. Day 100 Outstanding. I thought about it that morning and realized that I had learned some huge lessons. My quit only starts here, but forever seems a much less daunting goal than it did 100 days ago.
  2. Don't stand so far from the mirror when it's shaving time.

  3. So am I to believe you feel Sesame St. ranks higher than the USMC? Just who the hell d'ya think protected your boats all these years? I mean God knows a buncha sailors couldn't get it done. Squids.... they'll never accept the simple fact that the Navy is a lower form of Marine life.
  4. Why Larry? And what are you gonna do to make this next quit stick? Look, as one who tanked a 4 year quit I'd be the kettle calling teh pot black were I to berate you. But truth be told I really thought you found ample motivation (much of which was quite painful btw) to make dip free your new norm. All's I can say is show me a day 1 so I can tell you "welcome back" <>P P.S. - busy as a one armed bookie w/ two telephones lately so don't get on here much. Feel free to call if you'd like!
  5. Good thing you're wise enough to realize the pain of dad w/ dip would far outweigh the pain of Red Pecker Syndrome! Grats to you for staying strong, and hope your ship rights itself soon.
  6. Welcome Jim. There's no predetermined formula, but one that always seems to work is.... - go check in w/ your quit group - get and stay involved - read/post/read/post/read/post til your fingers bleed and your eyes feel like sandpaper - wake up the next day and do it again. In all honesty, here's the two fundamental truths about quitting that ring true w/ every member of this board: 1. Quitting ain't easy. It's gonna cause some pain, and require some effort. 2. Quitting is absolutely worth the effort. You stick with it and I promise you'll find the freedom you came looking for. It may take awhile, but it'll knock your sox off when you find it. Stay strong bro, you can do this. One day at a time.... <>P
  7. Forget about your mouth. Think of your soul. Look here's the thing... I spend many years agonizing over the curiosity of when I'd have to quit. And finally one day I found myself standing in front of the mirror at 11:30 pm when it hit me.... either I quit tobacco now, or it will kill me. Period. In the days that followed I realized I do not want to pass into eternity chasing an uncheckedd addiction. And from there I decided to free myself. Look bro, your mouth will heal in short order. Your spirit is gonna take a little longer to accept the notion of freedom, but trust me... it is absolutely worth every bit of effort. Stay Strong, <>P
  8. I'll let you in on a little secret.... you'll never wake up tomorrow thinking "gee I wish I caved yesterday". You remember that on top of what you wrote, and I guarantee you'll find the freedom you came looking for. One day at a time bro, one day at a time...
  9. pretty sage advice if you ask me.
  10. I hope to see you quit and post up. Saturday is good but today is better. If you start today you will be three days up by Saturday. Regardless, most of quitting is mental. Set your mind and do what you need to do to keep it out of your mouth. It isn't hope that keeps you quit but mental toughness and will power. This addiction is hard to kick and it takes determination, a positive mental attitude. If you have your mind right, you can quit. This site will give you a ton of support and knowledge you can use to give you a better chance at quitting. I hope that by writing that in public you really do commit to quitting on Sat. Reason I say so is tha I had a plan to quit Sat for about 10 years. Yep, every week went basically like this.... - Mon, I'm quitting on teh way to work. That's it. Toss the dip and woops... Mondays are too stressful, i'll buy a can at lunch and taper down in prep for a weekend quit. - Tue-Fri, I'd manage go taper back up from 1/2 a can to 2 cans a day. - Fri; who am I kidding? I can't quit on the weekend. I'll have one last dipfest andquit onMonday. - I'd chew about 3 cans a day in hopes of quitting on Monday. - Monday came around and it was teh same miserable realization of failed dreams. It never got better until I flat out quit. So if you're really gonna quit Saturday, then cool. But if you're lying to yourself, then what's it gonna take for you to finally grab the reigns of freedom?
  11. Sure, we have plenty of suggestions. First, scroll down just a little and read Donnie's response to Nummah. Then keep scrolling down and reading. Go back a page and read that, then back another page. Go to the quit groups and read the posts of the newest quit group, so you know what you can expect when you actually quit. Read the HOF speeches and other member articles. The answer to pretty much any question you ever had can be found somewhere on this site, because we've all been in your shoes and know what it's like to successfully quit using smokeless tobacco. Take it one day at a time, even one hour at a time if necessary. After about 3 days, the nicotine will be out of your system and many of the physical withdrawal symptoms will dissipate. But overcoming the mental cravings is a process that will most likely take many months or even years. Drink lots of water or juice early on to flush the nicotine out of your system. Exercise, if possible, during bad craves. Be very active on the website and get to know your fellow quit group members in September 2010, since they (like you) will reach their 100th day without tobacco during the month of September. Though everyone is free to post here in the Cafe, your quit group is an excellent place to post or read other member's questions about quitting. Stay strong and keep on quitting! 1- HOF speeches 2- look at the pics of what happens if you keep doing it 3- keep reading what you see on this site 4- ask yourself why you would continue to put a rotten knuckle of dirt in your mouth This is just a start. This is where I go whenever I have ever thought of a cave. And here I am, with the January, 2010 Jerkwads, 8 months without it. Who wouldhve thunk it. Dont do it.. Be smart and cool like the rest of us. Dont put it in your mouth. It stinks, its dangerous, and its gross. And your better half is proud of you without it. Dont. Just dont. My suggestion is: a) don't dip today b ) when you wake up tomorrow realize two things 1. you didn't wake up thinking "gee, I sure wish I caved yesterday" 2. if I managed to stay quit yesterday, ain't no reason I can't repeat that today. Tell you what lil bro.... one day at a time is the only way you're gonna beat this thing. Trust me.... I know it aint easy. But I also know that if you use the support found in this site, you'll develop the skills, courage, and confidence to stay quit for the long term. Stay Strong, one day at a time...
  12. Grats there 7. So how's your 9 iron doing? My PW is great. 4 years eh? That's fricking awesome!! Time goes by quickly eh?
  13. That is one of the coolest, most helpful things I have ever seen on this site. I wish I'd thought of it. PLEASE post this in the cafe and the newer quit groups! Pretty cool indeed. A little advice... don't get feaked out if the curve trends back upward in the near future. Reason being a lot of folks hit a funk around the 50-70 zone. If you hit it, just dig in to stay quit and it'll go away. Stay Strong
  14. Don't know if he can do anything about it, but you should send a PM to Flavious Victor. You can also find him in the 020304 old timer's thread. He's the big daddy creator of the site. Grats on your 11 days by the way. That's a great start to a fantastic new life. You'll have a few challenges along the path to freedom but trust me... every day you stay clean is so worth the effort. Stay Strong
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