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SerenityMan

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SerenityMan last won the day on November 25 2018

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About SerenityMan

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    I gave in, and admitted that God was God.
  • Birthday 07/01/1963

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    Huber Heights, OH

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  1. Howdy, Euty! Good to see you again, too!
  2. Kirov! Good to see you still around, too. One of my employees asked me about the site this morning. I thought I would introduce him to it.
  3. SerenityMan

    HEY, Y'all!

    I have been gone a LOOOOOOOOOOONG time! I don't recognize the names I'm seeing! Glad to see you all still carrying on the fight. If I make it 5 more days, I'll be claiming 10 years Copenhagen-free. Keep coming back, boys. This site saved my ass and it can save yours if you do what we suggest.
  4. Cool. Post up in June. We need more brothers in quit. I like this post and I don't know why. Maybe it's the determination after 3 caves in a week. Glad you're here, Bam. There is a rainbow on the other side. Not a gay rainbow. Not that there's anything wrong with being gay. But I'm not. I just like rainbows. Can't a guy like a fucking rainbow without being gay? Jeez! What's WRONG with you people?
  5. http://www.noadradio.com/music/Robert+Earl+Keen?l=0
  6. Do you have a smart phone? Are you on a computer with internet access everyday? Would you do anything in your power to help you quit? To break free from the bonds of nicotine? Drop the passive language...it sets you up for failure. I know, I've been there and done that. That's the bitch sweet talking you already. There is no reason that you can't post up daily. This site saved my quit on many occasions. Don't look at it as social media. This place is a refuge for folks to come and share with other folks who are battling a hell of an addiction. I promise, promise, promise you, you will not regret spending 5 minutes a day to post up. That single act will save your (quit)ass at some point. Make the commitment. Ditto what Tiger said. Half measures never got us anywhere when it comes to quitting.
  7. If dip were your meth-head girlfriend, you could say the same thing: "Meth-head Mary is bad. No one should kiss Meth-head Mary. I quit Meth-head Mary because I just should NOT be having sex with Meth-head Mary. At 42 years of age I have given up many things that were bad for me and some I miss and some I don't. Meth-head Mary is one I miss."
  8. Tony...Hang in!!! I once quit for 6 and a half years....and now, 2.5 years later I'm on here as a day 3 quitter.... I missed it, and it kicked my butt....you don't want to go through the quit madness again, believe me!! Cow I hear that. I just wonder if it is all worth it. Without dip I hate driving to work and I hate driving home. Going to camp and fishing and/or hunting doesn't have the same appeal. I quit golfing. I used to look forward to my lunch break. Each person's life is different. I know people that are wildly happy that they no longer dip. And people should quit. They should quit smoking and drinking beer and eating fatty, fried foods and driving fast and commiting crimes and sleeping around and gambling, etc. If I am still doing any of those things am I bad? I guess that life goes on. I have given up everything there is to give up. I can relate to what you're describing Tony. Maybe not quite as strong as you describe, but I definitely have lost interest in some activities since quitting dip, and really wish I didn't. I love to fish, but I don't have the patience that I did when dipping. Before I enjoyed just being out there regardless of if I caught anything or not, now I just can't seem to relax and enjoy being out there. Maybe there is a hobby out there that doesn't revolve around dip that you would be able to enjoy more without being so hung up on dip. I honestly could probably use the same thing. But just know you aren't the only one who feels that way. I am very happy that I'm quit, 99% of the time...the other 1% of the time I miss is desperately! It makes me feel guilty and like I must be messed up because everyone else seems so content. Maybe it will pass, it does seem to go in cycles. The last month has been very difficult for me. Just hang in there man, I just try to remember why I quit in the first place. Haven't gotten close to caving yet, but there has been some very frustrating days. Thanks, man. We are thinking the same way. Keep your head up. I am longer in my quit than you but you will probably feel much better about quitting by the time you get to where I am. It DOES get easier. If it didn't then I would cave. Probably the same with all addicts. They must all say "Man, I wish I could have just one ______" every so often but they know they can't. Sweet Tony, I was a little surprised to see you feeling that way at this point. Is your quit date still 2010? I just wanted to say that words have power. When you say "I loved dipping and still do," well, all you're doing is torturing yourself. I'm not sure I have the answer for this. I was intrigued by your statement that you have nothing left to give up. I've wondered about those things myself. There was always a hole in me, in my gut. I could fill it temporarily with vodka or dip or a woman, but in the end the hole remained. The vodka wore off, the dip became a necessity, not a pleasure, and women never behave the way you want. My hole wasn't a vodka-shaped hole. Not a dip-shaped hole, either. I had to look for something bigger that would fill it. There's a voice in some of us that tells us life would be more enjoyable if we could just goof off, get drunk, whore around, go to Vegas, gamble and hang out on the beach. Those of us who have good lives know that none of those things bring goodness or fulfillment into our lives. We chase those things and chase them and feel emptier and emptier. that's how it was with dip for me. It got to the point where I just needed it to feel not bat-shit crazy. With it I could function, but wasn't any happier. Without it I was a basket-case. UST had a direct line from my paycheck to their checking account and I didn't get shit out of the deal, except for all of the bad stuff that came with tobacco. Stop romanticizing it if you can. This addiction wants you dead. There's a US Tobacco employee who's counting on you to put his kid through trade school. Don't help him. Let the little fucker work at Taco Bell.
  9. Great series of short videos on addiction
  10. You know what's maddening? You cannot get good statistics on rates of oral cancer from chewing. I just visited four websites, including the CDC, and the articles are so vague, I feel like they're actively trying to obscure the truth. Here's what I found. The last time I posted about this some guy got pissed off, called me a bozo, and never came back to the site... The incidence of all oral cancer cases diagnosed per year is about 30-35000. Those are diagnoses, not deaths. Actual deaths from oral cancer number about 5000 per year. This includes smokers, drinkers, chewers, non-tobacco users, and people with HPV16, a common STD known for causing oral cancer. Let's say dippers account for 20 percent of all cases, which is probably an exaggerated estimate. That would mean dipping causes about 6000 incidences of oral cancer and 1000 deaths from oral cancer per year, and is about 30 times safer than driving a car. 75 to 80 per cent of dippers develop leukoplakia. 8.2 million Americans use smokeless tobacco. Using the higher rate of 80 per cent, that means about 6,560,000 Americans have leukoplakia. If all those who develop oral cancer get leukoplakia first (unlikely, but let's roll with it), that would mean about 9 out of 10,000 dippers with leukoplakia develop oral cancer, a rate of less than one in a thousand, or 0.09 per cent, each year. The guy that called me a bozo was angry that I would state true statistics to show the relative safety of dipping. I apparently ruined his motivation to quit. Well, all I can say is that these stats are as near to the truth as I can figure, and we all have a right to know the risks. I know the American Cancer Society and others have a mission to protect, but purposely obscuring the facts doesn't sit we'll with me. I don't like it when people or institutions try to sway me with half-truths. I hope this helps. I see a lot of near-hysteria on this site about cancer. Cancer does happen to dippers, and it shouldn't be taken lightly. But neither should we quit for wrong reasons. Speaking for myself, I didn't quit because I was afraid of dying. Hell, the risk of dipping probably gave me some kind of subliminal ego payoff. I couldn't quit for my health, my wife, my kids, or even myself. I had to find something more important.
  11. I have a 2203 days of freedom from nicotine that began at age 54 after a 30 year addiction. It actually went further back than that, but I enjoyed a one year quit in the late 1970s that I threw away in a moment of supreme stupidity. I have one question: What's magic about October 31 that you think you need to wait a couple of more months before beginning the journey to freedom? I've lost count of the people that have stopped by, made a statement of intent to quit on a distant date, but never returned. I hope you are one of them because FREEDOM from nicotine and the can is super and worth the early struggles through withdrawal. Count me in, too. 1391 days quit after a solid 30-year Copenhagen addiction. I agree with Euty. Now is always the best time to quit. I set a date over a month ahead, and it actually worked for me, but I'm the only one I know of who made it that way. I don't recommend it. BUT - whatever works for you. Just make sure you come back!
  12. As best I can remember, it was just a lack of accountability. Generally what would happen is I would stop posting on the site, the quit would no longer seem important, and eventually, I would drag myself back into it. My first cave was just stupid. I was around 9 months quit and I told myself, "I quit for 9 months. I can have 1 dip and I'll be fine" and sure enough I fell back into the fill boar. That was just stupidity on my part. The second and third caves were me not being accountable and sticking around the site for support. Living with a dipper slowly sucked me back in. Last year, I was less than 100 days into a quit, and I just said "fuck it" and caved. It was stupid, but I guess my heart wasn't in it. I really had to go back and revisit why I wanted to quit in the first place. Unfortunately, "finding myself" and finding my motive to quit and rediscovering the fact that I had the balls to man up and take the addiction head on came at the expense of falling back into the can for about 7 months. Time will tell if I've licked the addiction once and for all. For today, I'm kicking it's ass, and that's all that matters. Tomorrow is too far ahead, and yesterday may as well be prehistoric history. I quit for today, and I'll keep my promise. Tomorrow will be what tomorrow will be. Here's my 2 cents: Your question is the right one, Tackle. Every long-term ex-dipper I know got there by taking suggestions on how to avoid slips. None of them will tell you they got there by manning up, growing a set of balls and kicking the addiction's ass. The thought of it is laughable. It has already kicked our asses across the world and back (Literally. I chewed for 30 years, from Pennsylvania to California to Texas, Europe and back). In my book, the ones who win are the ones who admit that. If we somehow get the idea that we are stronger than nicotine because we were lucky enough to avoid it for 100 days, 6 months or 5 years, we are likely to think we're strong enough to have another go at it some day. And if we pick up one dip, we lose again. The addiction is cunning, baffling, powerful and very patient. I have 1390 days today, and I'm here to tell you that every time I fought with Copenhagen, it kicked my ass. If I lose that humility I will probably dip again. Today I choose not to fight it or try to prove I'm stronger than it. I know I'm not. The good news is that a day comes when you no longer want it. It's a better life. For now just trust us on that. Keep coming back!
  13. Maybe the site is so cluttered they really are posting, but there are so many forums and sub-forums, no one ever sees the new posts. Or maybe they get overwhelmed and move on to KTC.
  14. I found the following post from the 2009 Cafe. Since I haven't seen mls for a while, I'm taking the liberty to repost it. For those of you who don't know her, mylilsecret is one of the few women members, and she's been a great example of how giving and sharing strength makes you stronger. This is her post: mylilsecret, on Dec 28 2009, 03:25 PM, said: Imagine - Imagine being twelve and your first dip. Dad lets you do it around the garage with him as you tinker with his tools pretending to help. Pretty cool, huh? - Imagine being fifteen and your friends start hanging out at your house 'cause it's okay to dip around your parents. Heck, most of their parents haven't a clue about the dipping ritual that happens. - Imagine being nineteen and working with your father at his business. Both still dipping and enjoying the conversations you spend because you feel a connection, ...... even if it has to do with dip. - Imagine finding your first sore, ..... gums raw but you still keep using. Dad says its happened to him but it'll go away. So you pack it to the other side of your mouth. It feels somewhat less painful that way. - Imagine being twenty-one and the birth of your first and only son. You're so nervous but you need some dip to take that edge off. You ask the nurses for a cup to spit into. And while holding your son, you remind yourself to get another can after you leave the hospital since you're out. - Imagine being twenty-seven and your now six yr old wants to go hunting with you, like he has many times before but you tell him he can't go. He's unable to since there's going to be alcohol and a little party later at a friends house. Your son cries not understanding why Daddy won't take him hunting. You promise to take him another time. Maybe next weekend. Your wife reassures him as you scoot out the door without him noticing you've left. - Imagine hunting most of the day while drinking beer. Later that evening, you're at a friends house you've known since grade school. You guys start playing a little poker and get somewhat carried away with the shots of liquor, ... now being passed around. - Imagine feeling a bit dizzy and resting on the couch since the room won't stop spinning. Some time later, others pass by, your friends and laugh at you 'cause your drunker than shit. They believed you've passed out since they can hear you snoring. - Imagine being so intoxicated to the point that you've swallowed your snuff. And what they believe is snoring is actually you gasping for air since your wad of dip is lodged in the back of your throat. You're unable to move, .. unable to signal for help. At that moment ... you die .. slowly .. not from cancer .. but from choking on your own wad of dip. - Imagine in the morning your friends leaving for town; not wanting to wake you. One of them returns by mid-afternoon. Your wife is somewhat concern since you haven't called. He finds you in the same spot and to his shock, ............. you're unresponsive. - Imagine leaving behind your wife and son, your mother, father and sister, leaving behind your friends. One being me, who remembers playing truth or dare and having to kiss you. We were fourteen then. ---- (incidentally that's around the same time I started dipping secretly) - - Now I want you to sit back and imagine if cancer is truly the only culprit that can 'cause your death. This is a true story. Jay had a kind heart but was stupid to think he wasn't addicted. He believed he was invincible to cancer; ... to death. Yet sadly he died by asphyxiation. -mls Rest in peace, Jay Archibald! I hope you're death wasn't in vain and by telling your story will help someone take that first step to quit. (I posted this last year. I post it again as a reminder.)
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